Krjac

[Krjac]

Hi there,

just want to say I have struggled with depression for many years. Tried many medications with no real success. Seen many many psychologists, psychiatrists etc, pretty much to no avail.

I am now in a very bad (sad - losing my partner) situation, and I’m prepared to accept that I just need to give up, and end it. It’s all too hard. Have genuinely tried/sort help for many many years so haven’t come to this lightly.

[Sophie_M]

Hey Krjac,

You've shown so much courage in reaching out to our community tonight, and we are really grateful that you've taken such an important step in sharing your journey with us here. We're so sorry to hear that you've been struggling with these intense feelings and we can hear that this must be so difficult to cope with on top of your situation with your partner. We hope that you find these forums to be a safe space to express your thoughts and feelings, and our caring community is here to help offer support and advice during this really difficult time.

We are also currently getting in touch with you through email as we are worried about you.

In overwhelming moments like these, please know support is always help available to you, whether it be from the friendly counsellors at our Beyond Blue Support Service (1300 22 4636) or our friends at Lifeline (13 11 14) or the Suicide Call Back Service (1300 659 467). These services are always here for you 24/7, day or night, and you can access them as often as you need whenever things are feeling like too much to cope with. You never have to go through this alone.

If you feel unsafe or feel you are in immediate danger to yourself, this is an emergency it's really important that you contact 000 straightaway.

We really hope that you can find some comfort and support in the kind and understanding words from our community, and please feel free to keep updating us on what you're feeling and experiencing whenever you are ready.

[smallwolf]

hi and welcome to the forums.

I am sorry to hear to have not had much or any success with getting help. And yet... you have the strength and courage to the write a post on the forums here. Whether you have depression or not, losing someone is/ can be a very stressful event. I don't know if this will help, but if you wanted to tell more of your story here, I would listen. Would you come back and chat with me?

Tim

[Guest_4643]

Hey Krjac, welcome to the forums.

I'm sorry to hear you feel like nothing is working for you. I hope these forums are helpful to you.

I'm sorry you lost your partner also, that must be hard for you (I don't know about relationships but I can imagine how upsetting it would be).

I understand how you feel about giving up, I haven't had any help either apart from a Psychiatrist, and my GP is ok but doesn't do much for me, so I can relate to that.

Please don't give up though, I know how hard it is and that it's easier said than done. We're here for you. I hope you can find things that are helpful and therapeutic to you, including these forums.

[therising]

Hi Krjac

I wish there was something mind altering I could say to make all the difference to you right now, that kind of difference you really so very desperately need. In my opinion, the absolute depths of depression is one of the worst most torturous places to be in life. While my truly darkest moment was some years ago, it still remains clear in my mind. I feel for you so very much.

Mind altering life changing psyches/therapists are rare but they are out there. During my years in depression, I must admit I never came across one and the long depressing search for the right anti depressant I would have to compare to the search for the Holy Grail, leaving one to think 'Does this thing actually exist?!' I wish professionals managed that search more strategically than what they typically do. It's definitely a depressing search when one after the other just doesn't seem to work. I know this is sounding far from being a pep talk but I just want to relate to how hopeless things can feel at certain times. I'm glad you came here, whether it be purely to vent or something just said 'Go on Beyond Blue' and you just went with it or you're actually looking to make some difference at this point. Although depression felt like a living hell for me at times, what did make some difference was feeling 'normal' while I was in it. For me, group therapy was what led me to feel 'normal' during my 15 or so year battle with depression. Finally finding people who could relate to the challenges of depression was what began to make some difference. Up 'til then, it had always felt incredibly lonely. Perhaps coming here will begin to make some difference for you, especially after such a challenging separation from your partner. Certain challenges can feel so incredibly cruel, especially when we're already down.

I hope you return here. I hope you re-turn to the people who want to make a difference in your life. I find that sometimes the greatest revelations come from those who can relate to how we feel. Others can only imagine the pain and desperation, when they have never felt it.

Looking forward to hearing from you 🙂