hey, just want someone to talk to :)

[Lucette]

ive been self-harming recently, not dramatically or anything. like I know people are so much worse of than me, but like I don't have anyone to talk to. i moved to a new town and everyone is racist and homophobic and sexist, and the people I'm around make it obvious that they hate me.

I'm just tired and lonely, like everything just takes so much effort and when I fight with my parents SH kinda makes me feel in control. they noticed once but kinda just told me not to do it. i did finally get a therapist appointment which is good I guess.

i just miss my old friends who understood and I cant talk to them bc my parents took my phone. anyway thanks

love ya

[Sophie_M]

Hey Lucette,

We're so sorry to hear how ovewhelming things are feeling for you right now, but you've shown so much courage in reaching out to our community, and taking such an important step in sharing your journey with us here. We're so sorry to hear that you've been struggling with self-harm, and intense thoughts and feelings that must be so difficult to cope with. We hope that you find these forums to be a safe space to express your thoughts and feelings, and our caring community is here to help offer support and advice during this really difficult time.

We are also currently getting in touch with you through email as we are worried about you.

It's really great to hear that you've organised an appointment with a therapist to talk these thoughts and feelings through, however if things are feeling overwhelming before this appointment, please know support is always help available to you, whether it be from the friendly counsellors at our Beyond Blue Support Service (1300 22 4636) or our friends at Lifeline (13 11 14) or Kids Helpline (1800 55 1800). These services are always here for you 24/7, day or night, and you can access them as often as you need whenever things are feeling like too much to cope with. You never have to go through this alone.

We really hope that you can find some comfort and support in the kind and understanding words from our community, and please feel free to keep updating us on what you're feeling and experiencing whenever you are ready.

[jumpyjellyfish-]

hey Lucette,

I'm sorry that you've been feeling so tired and lonely, it sounds like moving has taken a toll 😞 Hopefully you can find some friends at your school or somewhere who are kind to you, and remember that if people are being rude or nasty to you, chances are it's not you, it's them. I know that sucks because no one deserves to be mistreated but just never blame yourself.

I understand what you mean about SH being a way of being in control... it's a coping strategy and even though it's a bad one it can sometimes feel like a relief or regaining control when we have a lot going on. I know you don't have your phone at the moment, but there is an app called calm harm which I've found can be helpful with self harm urges because it has a bunch of different coping strategies based on your emotions and what you need which you could install on the device you typed this on? Otherwise, there are a lot of options out there as to different ways to cope and it's just about finding what actually works for you. It's sometimes hard to stop the urge, but it's about riding the wave and then the urge can be reduced.

Btw, in all honesty whether you self harm is 'drastic' or not, it is still self harm and I can see how much pain you are in to want to hurt yourself and I just want you to know that you are not alone and we are here for you and you can turn to us to reach out when you need. I hope this helps, just know we are here for you xx

Take care xx sending lots of hugs

[Lucette]

thanl you, i never want to over react about my self harm. some of my old friends did it really badly I and I don't want to be like 'i self harm too" because I know how much harder they have it. i have know idea why I'm like this, like my family tries to be supportive but they don't know how to help.

like I'm not really suicidal i get really anxious but that's it.

my parents take my phone away for every little thing and I cant talk to my friends or anyone. I've begged them to take it stop it but they think that its the best parenting option.

thank you for replying!!

[jumpyjellyfish-]

no problem 🙂

I'm the same with self harm, I often feel like I can't go to anyone about it because I feel like it's not 'bad enough.' I get it, I understand the dilemma between wanting to tell someone you need help but feeling 'dramatic' I guess you just have to try and see it from someone else's perspective, like if a friend or family member was self harming like you, I'm sure you would take them seriously and want to help. Same goes for you, you deserve that love and support 🙂

Parents a lot of the time don't know how to support you and it sometimes sucks. Sometimes you have to actually tell your parents what they can do to help you, as hard as it might be, because they don't always know, and they're learning too. Taking your phone because they think it's good parenting is an example. Only thing I can say is just try and have a calm discussion with them about why it's not helpful and ask that they listen to you.

I'm glad you were able to get a therapy appointment btw- they can help you work through in person your emotions and figuring out what you can do to feel better as soon as possible

🙂