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helping a friend

patrick_good
Community Member

how do you help a friend if they are suicidal

2 Replies 2

Sophie_M
Moderator
Moderator
Dear patrick_good,
 
Thank you for joining our forums and having the compassion and kindness to seek help for a friend struggling with suicidal thoughts. While you wait for our lovely forums community to engage with you about supporting your friend, we just wanted to pop in and provide you with a few helpful links.
 
If your friend is currently suicidal and you’re concerned for their safety or that they may act on these urges, please contact Emergency Services on 000 and inform them of the situation.
 
Two services that stand out when discussing supporting friends and family with thoughts of suicide are Lifeline and the Suicide Callback Service. Both services specialize in directly supporting those individuals struggling with suicidal thoughts and can also provide advice and guidance to family and friends supporting an individual with these thoughts.
 
Both services are available 24/7 and we encourage you to get your friend to give either service a call when then need help. You can contact the Suicide Callback Service (call on 1300 659 467) or Lifeline on 13 11 14 or at Lifeline.
 
We're also here for you or your friend anytime you need us, our counselors are available via phone 1300 22 4636 or through Beyond Blue Online Chat. It can really help having someone to talk to, let us offer help and guidance to support your friend or if you need to discuss anything that may be affecting you due to this situation.
 
Beyond Blue also have a safety planning app for thoughts of suicide, please encourage your friend to have a look: Click here for more info.
 
Thank you again for reaching out to support a friend in need, it really can make all the difference knowing that you have support.
 
Warm regards
Sophie M

therising
Valued Contributor
Valued Contributor

Hi patrick_good

 

You're a beautiful person, a brilliant guiding light and support for your friend. They're blessed to have you in their life.

 

With Sophie having offered some good resources, I suppose what I can add involves a handful of what has worked for me at times over the years. Of course, what works for some doesn't always work for others.

 

  • Finding an anchor person or people that anchor us into this world. Before I became a mum, I had my nephew who was my anchor person, someone I just couldn't leave
  • Having people who listen carefully. People who don't fully listen to how much someone's suffering tend to say stuff like 'You'll be right. You just need to stop dwelling on things'. You listening has led you to seek guidance for your friend
  • Gaining understanding of emotions/feelings and their purpose. When you can feel your thoughts, what others say to you, a lack of all the things you desperately need or want in life, when you can feel the feeling of being completely lost or feel the grief that comes with heartbreak (including the grief that can come with having lost some part of yourself) it can become so overwhelmingly challenging. Having someone to help work out why we're feeling the way we are makes feeling our way through life just a little bit easier. They act as a 'fast tracker' along life's path
  • Establishing a circle. With you being in that circle, is it time to expand? The question becomes 'Who to add?'. Whether it be a mental health professional or someone who's more a soulful kind of guide, another friend or family member who cares deeply, a really good GP, people on the forums here who'll be able to relate in some way, the challenge is to build a circle of reliable 'go to' people
  • Knowing how the dark inner dialogue works and what it sounds like. The 'you' or 'you're' factor can play a major part. 'You're hopeless. No one loves you' etc. That you or you're factor's a strange one for sure and well worth understanding and mastering. Should add, it's not about hearing a voice, it's simply about sensing words/dialogue that comes to mind