Football suspension

[M-MM]

I got suspended from football for 11 games after i got made fun of and was provoked during the game and i made a mistake i didn’t hurt the person but i made a mistake i got banned for 11 weeks football is all i had i have nothing without football it’s my escape from everything it’s all i had and i lost it im not a bad person i apologised to my coach and the person right after and a few weeks later i got told at training that im suspended from games for 11 weeks i cant eat and i cant sleep since the suspension i haven’t slept before 4 im spiraling down fast everyone has such high expectations of me and i dont even know if i can play anymore my future might have been ruined im really tired of everything without football im actually nothing there’s no point of me being on this earth i would do anything to reverse this and if i can’t i know what i should do there’s gonna be an appeal soon and if that doesn’t work ill have nothing after this ive lost everyone i dont know if i can do this for that long i had everything a few days ago now i have nothing im not a bad person ill do anything to change this if anyone has any advice please help me i was really good too i had offers in good clubs higher age groups training with people that are multiple years older in the first division learning training everyday doing what i love its all i can talk about and now i have nothing if anyone has any advice please this is my all and im losing please help.

[therising]

The warmest of welcomes to you at such an incredibly challenging time in your life.

Being suspended from participating in something you love so much and something that's such a strong part of your identity would be heartbreaking, stressful, potentially depressing amongst other things. Such an intensely emotional time for you. Given this is something you've never faced before, I'm wondering whether you can think of who would be the best guide to guide you through this. Would your coach be a good guide? Is this something he's helped other players through before? Is he someone you could speak to?

Whether it's at VFL or AFL levels, suspension is something players are known to mentally struggle with in a number of ways. Maybe a bit of an internet search could help in understanding how footballers come to manage at such a time. Based on their experience, they may offer a number of things you could relate to.

At the most challenging times in our life, there is always the opportunity to learn about ourself. Don't miss this opportunity. Maybe you're learning or coming to fully realise 

1. Just how much you love the game. While you knew you did, before this, now you're perhaps coming to fully realise
2. What your triggers are on the field and what types of players trigger you. Everyone has a tipping point in life, regarding a variety of circumstances. Sometimes we don't know what our tipping point is until we meet it. I can relate. Some people or situations can bring out parts of me that I'm not a fan of
3. Who are the best people to turn to for support or seek guidance from when there's a need for support and guidance. You might establish that the forums here could always be a good place to start with in life. You might find out your coach is a great all 'round support person in life, when it comes to a variety of challenges (not just football). During the greatest of challenges, we find out who are our best guides and who are definitely not our 'go to' people
4. How to manage stress in your body and how to manage certain thoughts or internal dialogue while under stress

and the list goes on.

Wishing you only the best regarding the appeal. Hopefully the suspension's overturned or at least the amount of time is reduced.