Reality Check

[amd1953]

If you are feeling anxious and depressed, perhaps the last thing you need to read is a book written by Emil Cioran.   He was a Romanian writer/philosopher who wrote some of the most pessimistic books on the planet, including one entitled 'The Trouble with Being Born'.   However, the book is beautifully written, and it shows what other people have to endure during their lifetime.   I am always interested in what other people have to go through although most of us wouldn't feel compelled to write about it.   I could write a hundred books about my life in the hope that it would help other people.   Unfortunately, I lack the motivation to accomplish such a task, so I come on to the BB forum to try to do it that way.   Litle snippets of experience and knowledge that might just prove useful to someone who is undergoing a similar experience.   Sometimes, when I outline something on here, I think afterwards that nobody would have done what I did anyway.   For example, as a child I was convinced that my life was preordained in some way and that all I had to do was show up and everything would work out fine.   Not so!   In reality, you have to fight for everything you want while trying to assure people that you are worth their time.  Naturally, other people have had a hand in my downfall because I was convinced that everyone had my back.   Not so!   We are in competition with every other person on the planet and they don't always have our best interests at heart.   It would be nifty if we could transfer the history of our lives to a DVD and use them as training tools for the upcoming generation.   Just an idea!

amd1953

[amd1953]

I just love that question.   What's on your mind?   Gosh!   Where do I start?   Well, I could start with being born.   Not one of us asked to be here and not one of us will get out of here alive.   Placed in perspective, that is an absurd situation.   Why can't we live forever and just regenerate every few hundred years?   Would anyone want to live forever?   That is the question I am just dying to ask.   Birth is where it all starts for all of us human beans.   For some it will work out just fine but for others, not so much.   There will be whispers of mental health issues which habitually corrode our minds.   Then there are people.   Our fellow Homo Sapiens who will prove to be either a help or a hindrance during our short stay on Planet Chaos.   I can only speak for myself and yes, I do not doubt for a minute that there are good, decent law-abiding souls out there.  I just haven't met any yet.   As for me, I am a strange concoction of the good, the bad and the ugly.   I am a saint and a sinner and everything in between.   I have done my fair share of giving and I have done what I can for others in need.   I have willingly donated to various charities and literally funded other people's chosen lifestyles.   Overall, I don't think I'm a bad person but that remains to be seen.

I have been called everything under the sun, and I am convinced that people look at me and think I am stupid.   If I had any sense, I might be tempted to agree with them.   However, it is the old sticks and stones proverb.   I continue to live my life as I see fit.   I may be surrounded by nine billion other souls, but I do not know any of them.   Would I really want to?   The few that I do encounter from time to time, I just smile and keep walking.   If I am lucky, I may receive a grunt or a vague nod of acknowledgement.   It bothers me not.   If given the chance I could survive a direct nuclear strike and tell a mighty fine story afterwards.   In the end, all of my days are numbered, and my hidden shelf-life is a matter of conjecture.

I am alone and wish to stay that way until I fall off the perch.   Let the world forge ahead without me.

amd1953

[white knight]

Well, an interesting post

What about the wonder of life? Coincidences,  earth is at the perfect position from our sun to develop life. Our moon is at the exact distance from us to give us waves and weather. Humans developed due to one in a million chances. Here we are. Intelligent and wonderful. 

Then there's reproduction of life. When that happens, a parent has more than enough reason to provide, protect, guide and nurture. 

Why are we community champions and some members  here? Because to care, to show empathy for those struggling through life gives purpose, there's nothing more rewarding than saving people from dark society or themselves.

Dark society? Yes, as a former prison officer I can admit that you cannot change the dark side of society but you can move to a place with little likelihood of crime (3-6,000 people) and on Facebook you can block 🚫 the toxic trolls, through life you can drop off the manipulators and embrace like minded people.

"If we focus on a bees sting we miss the wonder of it collecting nectar"

As for living forever? Over 60yo that changes. By then you'll accept you no longer want to. Until the life can be a blast...

[amd1953]

My adventures in this world have, sadly, amounted to very little.   If I had been worth my salt, I would have cured all cancers by now, fed every starving person in the world and halted climate change.   As it stands at the moment, I have achieved none of these things and never will do.   I have endured one of those lives which is probably better to erase from my mind than celebrate the fact that I was here.   I am now over 73 years of age and getting older by the day.   I have had my tilt at those windmills that obsessed Don Quixote and now I lie battered and bruised in a field somewhere in Flanders.   I have hung up my sword and shield for a life of peace and contentment.   In my time I have been a Grand Master of the Hermetic Order of the Golden Dawn and a Knight Templar.   A sparkling resume for someone so invisible to the modern world.   These days I tour my castle quoting huge chunks of Shakespeare to an appreciative audience of loyal courtiers and disinterested bats and spiders.   Sir Laurence Olivier would be proud of my Henry V.   It is all a slow but relentless slide into a lot of nothingness while I attempt to retain my sanity.   A task which weighs heavily on an already troubled mind.   A world awaits me outside which has not only lost its way but also the will to do anything other than fight and make life more depressing for those who never have a say in anything.   Tis a sadness born of tragic comedy!

amd1953

[Shell4]

Hello there. I don't fully understand all that you wrote. Yet it is written with an elegant type of mind. Maybe filled with a mystery of some kind.

I wonder if you are discussing purpose in life. Perhaps our own unique purpose of why we are here. I think I am bringing this up because I walked through a cemetary today and read some of the stones . And these people who I don't know once lived and now they no longer do. I thought what is the purpose in all of this. 

Anyway a big hello to you

[amd1953]

Hello Shell4,

I do tend to waffle when I am in full flight and if I lose anyone along the way I can only offer my apologies.   It's just my way of expressing myself or at least trying to I suppose.   I can't stand the idea of leaving this place without having had some kind of presence.   Although sometimes I wonder if this is the right place to offer what I do.   I like to make people think and to question what I say.   I feel as though I have been misunderstood all of my life.  This is my way of attempting to make amends.   Perhaps that is the mystery.   

Regards

amd1953