Do we expect a smooth road in life?

[white knight]

 

As we grow, cared for by our parents, we reach teenage years and we are young, often healthy and we don’t have much idea where we’ll end up – not that we are worried.

I remember when I was 17o and had left school. I was waiting for the RAAF to tell me when they would send me from Victoria to SA for recruit training. I had a plan, to serve 20 years and get a defence pension from 37yo onwards. I’d rise up through the ranks, maybe even officer material because “my family is smart”.

I lasted 3 years and my driving offenses, frequent drunkenness …all things that made my bosses angry…led to my demise. Reset journey.

In fact I reset the journey numerous times just as many of us have. I think (IMO) that us with emotional fragility constantly reset our pathways. We arrive at “Y” intersections all the time and take another course…always thinking we can find a better happier path to stability. Always chasing the dream via a forest of nightmares.

So when we were about say, early twenties to say early thirties, we hoped for and expected to have a healthy life. What a whack we got if we found out we were to have one or many medical hoops to jump through and a larger challenge when we are told by some (including me on these forums) that your challenge with your mental care should be seen as a life long management strategy not a quick fix or even a few years fix.

So its reasonable and apt to remember that most of us expect life to be an easy road.

In terms of facing life in a manner that it wont likely be easy I don’t know what the answer ris. The more children are insulated from their future challenges in terms of health the better the parenting really. They are protecting them right? I’m no psychologist but I would assume teaching children that their journey through life will include some bumpy roads will prepare them for real life issues, that they have to overcome.

I’m just concerned as to the frequency of new members that when they receive a diagnosis for a mental illness the horror is too much to bare when in reality with appropriate medical care they can lead near normal lives.  

Yet again its like a physical disability – to accept one has a permanent lower back injury or arthritis or other physical disability, having a mental illness is an injury we have to accept. The earlier acceptance is achieved the quicker one can return to the lives along the same journey pre diagnosis.

Is acceptance of ones mental illness your biggest challenge?

[white knight]

Hi

This thread is more interesting than I thought it would be.

So I wonder what tags we can come up with, a list that we can choose to describe our issues?

Mental illness - emotional troubles

Depression- having down times

Anxiety- just on shaky ground lately

OCD- I just like to be sure its locked

Bipolar 2- bad mood? I just swing from happy to sad sometimes.

That's a start but I still would find it difficult to implement. It should be easier than this right? To be evasive as to not expose us as potentially something to run away from.

Which contradicts my earlier claim really. That I am approaching the corner that reads "I don't care what they think"...its clear I still do. I might get stuck here just like some get stuck in the hump of acceptance of their condition.

Sitting here, this is a revelation and it shows clearly what can come about when we talk and think and share on this magnificent site.

Tony WK

[blondguy]

Hey Tony

I think your post has highlighted what can be achieved on BB through our individual coping mechanisms and techniques in dealing with our own breed of 'Black Dog'

You do have a innate sense of 'clarity' that doesn't come easily to many people Tony

Your last sentence in the first paragraph of  your thread is so very valid and helpful I will copy and past it;

"Is acceptance of ones mental illness your biggest challenge?"

You have offered 'people' (not sufferers) the key they can unlock the door with Tony...:-)

Grazie, mio caro amico

Paul

[white knight]

Hi Paul

"You have offered 'people' (not sufferers) the key they can unlock the door with Tony" Thankyou. Perhaps I've picked up on some of the teachings of Prem Rawat (I have mentioned him in many threads) in terms of his teachings.

Otherwise known as Maharaji his keys to knowledge are covered well when googled-

"Maharaji the keys words of peace"

My fav - Maharaji Prem Rawat sunset

Maharaji Prem Rawat the perfect instrument

He rubs of fon you after a while...for me its now 27 years that I've followed his teachings.

Cheers friend Tony WK

[geoff]

dear All, well there haved been different sides to the equation, and anyone can agree with either side.
People can say to somebody that was an alcoholic 'you're still an alcoholic' even though they aren't, just like me, although it's not actually said but assumed, because that label won't go away, so do you accept what they say or do you get annoyed and saddened, well everyone is different, for me I just laugh it off because I know it's not true.
The same applies to someone who doesn't want to shout you a cup of coffee, even though you're shouted them many times before, and again get annoyed or won't want to have a cup with them any more, so we ostracise them and so the friendship diminishes away.
It's no different than someone who has OCD, people ask why do you have to do this again, are you stupid or what, and can be labelled as being 'rather strange'.
I'm only saying this because all of this means we are always labelled, not only to our face but certainly behind our back, and this label always sticks, but then it depends on how the actual person takes it, and then what happens if someone has cancer and is going to die, (only hypothetically please) then they are then labelled by whatever term is used.
Is there another word to replace the word 'suffer', maybe victim, have, had, struggled with, had to cope with or struck down with, perhaps all of these or anyone of these, but personally I've had a problem with alcohol when in depression, had people not shout me back, certainly have OCD and the biggest one is I've had depression, so to me I've had to suffer, and to me, suffer means is that I have had to go through all the trials and tribulations of all of these illness's.
All the other words I have said I also accept or what ever else people have called me I can't dispute, because they have seen what I have had to go through, whether or not they understand or want to accept is up to them, because labels stick.Geoff.

[White_Rose]

Hello Paul

Well said for telling your postie you were made redundant and have depression. I also tell anyone who asks I have depression. My point, which you have not understood, is that mental illness is a generic term, a comment I made above. Specifically I would always say depression because that is the mental illness I have. I also have bursitis and its generic term is an inflammatory illness. Get the picture?

Mary

[hellohi]

Hi TonyWK,

THAT WAS AN AMAZING POST!

You add so much detail, character and support in your posts and they help people like me learn so much and be inspired!

Thanks TonyWK

[white knight]

Thankyou again Neerja,

I used to get upset when I’d forget to pay an invoice. Then I realised- it was normal to miss one now and again.

So, every year I’d allow myself two invoices like registration of the car or power bill, to be missed, when I missed one I’d say to myself- “that’s ok because I have one left for the year.

This all means giving yourself latitude, being gentle in yourself.

Accepting a rough road in life as being normal means expecting hiccups along the way. So then they don’t surprise you.

TonyWK

[hellohi]

Hi TonyWK,

You have gone through a tough journey, you have become such a strong, resilient and wonderful person and now you are helping people with your kind words, support and advice. That is amazing!

I will try to accepting a rough road.

Thanks TonyWK and hope you have a great day,

Neerja