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Just Sara A Bouquet for Pearls - share your appreciation for other members
  • replies: 715

Every now and then, members share a beautiful Pearl of Wisdom. How often do you think to yourself; "OMG that's great! I wish everyone could see this." Presenting someone with a bunch of flowers is a generous way of acknowledging their insightful word... View more

Every now and then, members share a beautiful Pearl of Wisdom. How often do you think to yourself; "OMG that's great! I wish everyone could see this." Presenting someone with a bunch of flowers is a generous way of acknowledging their insightful words. I hope this thread stays active through members giving out praise regularly to people they feel deserving, and therefore keep generosity of spirit alive within the pages of BeyondBlue Forum. My bunch of Red Roses (my choice) goes to Wishful for the following sentence; 'Personally, I see no reason to be praised in me, but I'm learning that seeing through the eyes of others can be more accurate!!' I so hear you Wishful. Just beautiful... Try to keep your leading comments short to focus on 'their' words. Choose specific flowers (or a gift if you like) to present to them. Sign off respectfully and sincerely. I hope this takes off... Spreading the love...Sara

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white knight Overweight?
  • replies: 2

It must be torturous to dream of being a model as a career choice when your BMI (body mass index is pear shaped (sic). We are told we can be anything we choose to become in life which is so false as if an elephant chose to enter greyhound racing. As ... View more

It must be torturous to dream of being a model as a career choice when your BMI (body mass index is pear shaped (sic). We are told we can be anything we choose to become in life which is so false as if an elephant chose to enter greyhound racing. As a person that is nearly as tall lying down as standing up, I cringe when the doctor asks me to stand on the scales... in fact I now refuse. “Thanks anyway doc, but I know you’ll say my BMI is bad and I should lose weight and I can’t and I’ll get depressed about your comments then have to return to talk to you about these triggers that started with those scales” Ok, so I don’t believe in the BMI. I can’t stick to diets that have been on and off for 50 years now and when I have been motivated enough to lose 15 kilo over say 6 months lurking in my subconscious is the fact- I’m going to put most of it back on. My 4 aunties on my dads side were all over 180kg. My mother was dumpy, what hope is there to be average weight for height?-BMI? Zero. Sounds negative yes? Not quite. Balance is something I have implemented. Very little alcohol, gave up smoking 32 years ago, plenty of fruit and veggies and sugar free biscuits. With a past history of anxiety now free, bipolar and dysthymia I’m a worrier, so continuing to worry over anything has its own health risks like stroke and heart conditions along with more depressive episodes. So while I’m not a dietician,GP, etc I am an expert in my own capacities to lose weight. It is pathetic. But I do know that there comes a time when one should be realistic and drop the dreams of being that greyhound. Be who you are and be sensible with eating. Slice that fat off the bacon, dish up one less sausage, give yogurt a try instead of double cream etc and walk and walk. Swap thoughts of your spare tyre with focussing on deep breathing, receive the joy of picking your own veggies instead of take away... subtle change will improve your health with lower stress levels and you’ll feel more alive. We attend our GP to maintain good health, some of it is in our own hands. Enjoy life better with good healthy foods and a daily exercise regime. TonyWK

Guest5643 Loud and proud🐾🐾
  • replies: 3

Hi I'm proud and have no shame my dog was my mental illness assistance dog and will be again. People have and will judge us but so be it i feel sorry for them. Lynne

Hi I'm proud and have no shame my dog was my mental illness assistance dog and will be again. People have and will judge us but so be it i feel sorry for them. Lynne

Yarraman Bushfires
  • replies: 5

It's hard for me to turn on the tv at the moment as I can't seem to cope with all the bad fires. And I was an auxiliary firefighter and am a rural firefighter. I suffer from depression. I can't understand why this is affecting me this way. As it norm... View more

It's hard for me to turn on the tv at the moment as I can't seem to cope with all the bad fires. And I was an auxiliary firefighter and am a rural firefighter. I suffer from depression. I can't understand why this is affecting me this way. As it normally wouldn't. Hope all stay safe.

JazzyB Staying well through difficult times
  • replies: 1

Hi i’ve been having such a difficult time following my partner of 5 years separating from me. They wanted to open themselves up to seeing new ppl and having new experiences. My partner made up a huge part of life, including socially, through their am... View more

Hi i’ve been having such a difficult time following my partner of 5 years separating from me. They wanted to open themselves up to seeing new ppl and having new experiences. My partner made up a huge part of life, including socially, through their amazing network or friends and in the queer community. Since separating I’ve not only found myself with all the negative narrative about myself (not good enough, worthy of rejection, failing at life, not special blah blah) I’ve found myself thrust into isolation as I have little friends. Since separating 6 months ago I have spiraled in lots of different ways. Although I have managed to look after myself in terms of healthy diet and daily exercise my anxiety, depression and bad thoughts have amplified. Despite being in therapy I’m finding no reprieve to liking myself or feeling content in life. Other than that the person and life I loved has abandoned me. I feel spiritually depleted and isolated from family as they don’t like to discuss emotions. My saving grace has been having a good job but as soon as I’m done for the day or weekend I go into complete emotional collapse at home. I’m trying to come up with a game plan on how I can move forward in life, feel good again about myself, make new friends. All of my attempts at this are failing and welcome any suggestions or advice.

Samsonsam Working from home
  • replies: 1

I have seen a few posts where people are stressing about getting a job due to either social anxiety or some other type of anxiety. So here are a few tips. 1. Get a job working from home - There is plenty of online work now days that pay $20+ per an h... View more

I have seen a few posts where people are stressing about getting a job due to either social anxiety or some other type of anxiety. So here are a few tips. 1. Get a job working from home - There is plenty of online work now days that pay $20+ per an hour. I have an online job where I earn $80k a year, choose my starting and finishing hours and get unlimited annual leave. I had degrees besides by year 12 certificate and even in year 12 I did horribly. This isn't to brag this is to point out times are changing there are plenty of online jobs. Better yet if you still have free time and arent rushing to get a job use that time to self study an industry. The best way to learn about a particular industry is to find the subreddit or a forum dedicated to it. 2. Once you do have a job your anxiety isn't going to go away in fact if you dont try deal with it it may increase. After getting my job I rarely went out and my anxiety went up 10 fold. I now deal with it by meditating daily, going for daily walks, and going to the shops every couple of days. 3. Be ambitious - when I got my current job I did it because I lost my life saving and i was fed up with working in the career I had chosen. I pushed myself to apply for jobs I didnt actually think I would stand a chance at getting. 4. Where do I find online work? - use job search engines but dont use Australian based ones. Find ones that are dedicated to startups or international work. Sites like seek will be useless because they focus on Australian industry work. 4. Dont work from home -working from home is not for everyone. It can be lonely, make you lazy and complacent, requires more self responsibility. My overall suggestion would be for you to fight for a career that you actually have an interest in. Focus on dealing with your stress and anxiety. Know that people care about you even if we dont know you personally nothing hurts more than reading a story about someone that has anxiety, depression or had committed suicide. There are good people in the world that want the best for you.

Lookingforpeace Be kind to yourself
  • replies: 21

Hi everyone I like to think I am kind to others, and judging by the posts on these forums I know you are all kind people too. But often I forget to be kind to myself. I didn't go to work today because I'm sick and feel guilty that I'm not at work. Fe... View more

Hi everyone I like to think I am kind to others, and judging by the posts on these forums I know you are all kind people too. But often I forget to be kind to myself. I didn't go to work today because I'm sick and feel guilty that I'm not at work. Feel bored. Feel lazy. But you know what? Sometimes it's ok to sit in your robe all day. Sometimes it's ok to nap, wake up, then nap again! Sometimes it's ok to watch daytime TV. I hope you are all kind to yourselves today

brokenbluecat How do I find Motivation?
  • replies: 6

Hi, I have had depression for over 20 years. In the last 12 months I have been admitted to hospital on 3 occasions for TMS. I was discharged from hospital about 3 weeks ago after TMS and a med change. I was getting ready to return to work and was adv... View more

Hi, I have had depression for over 20 years. In the last 12 months I have been admitted to hospital on 3 occasions for TMS. I was discharged from hospital about 3 weeks ago after TMS and a med change. I was getting ready to return to work and was advised the company I work for had to restructure. This means I with 130 others will be made redundant. Now I am lost, scared and confused. I am finding it really difficult to get out of bed and motivate myself to do anything. I am wondering if I need to go back into hospital, what do I tell prospective employers, how do I find motivation and when will I be better again? I have spoken to my psychologist and cannot see my psychiatrist for another 2 weeks. Any tips on how I can find motivation to will myself to get better? Thanks

Quercus Loneliness and Isolation... The silent killers.
  • replies: 13

On the local radio station a guest speaker raises a topic that hits me hard. He describes visiting people to provide mental health support. All ages. All walks of life. With a curious commonality. Nearly all have almost no contacts on their phone who... View more

On the local radio station a guest speaker raises a topic that hits me hard. He describes visiting people to provide mental health support. All ages. All walks of life. With a curious commonality. Nearly all have almost no contacts on their phone who they can call and talk to. Some have no contacts at all. Driving my kids to school an hour away I realise this is why I committed to driving. Moving. Because human beings cope better with a community. So we moved to find one. The idea isn't new. An urban sociologist called Ray Oldenburg wrote about the need for 'Third places'. The first place is home. The second work or study. The third place is informal social spaces. Places to be part of a community. We see the words loneliness and isolation and the term no support network day after day on the forums. So I wanted to ask you... Where do you go to connect with people? What do you do to form fulfilling connections? I hope we can give people realistic ideas. Affordable. Practical. I want to brainstorm ideas of where to start. What to try. Anyone have a third place they have found rewarding? ❤ Nat

Abbie121 Weekend loneliness and isolation
  • replies: 9

Hey everyone Just wanted to get your thoughts and insights about coping with loneliness and feelings of isolation, particularly on the weekends. Having recently come out of a long-term relationship and just starting to feel somewhat okay about that a... View more

Hey everyone Just wanted to get your thoughts and insights about coping with loneliness and feelings of isolation, particularly on the weekends. Having recently come out of a long-term relationship and just starting to feel somewhat okay about that and trying to move forward, I find myself sitting at home alone every Saturday night and it's starting to get to me. I miss the closeness and intimacy of being at home with a loved one - I'm a homebody at heart. I have some friends who I sometimes initiate planning an outing with, but I find that if I don't do that, they don't ask me, so I'm alone most of the time when not at work. I know the common advice is to join groups, start new hobbies etc, but I'd prefer to be comfortable at home a lot of the time - and am definitely not ready for a new partner or to date. Would love to hear any advice or tips people have or if you've been in a similar situation. x

Loco23 A Big Decision To Make
  • replies: 3

I'm 26, been living at home with my mum and dad and older brother recently moved out. I've been going through a bit of a rough patch in the last four years since I graduated uni in that: - Ex girlfriend (4 year relationship) broke up with me. - Strug... View more

I'm 26, been living at home with my mum and dad and older brother recently moved out. I've been going through a bit of a rough patch in the last four years since I graduated uni in that: - Ex girlfriend (4 year relationship) broke up with me. - Struggled to find any long term relationship. Still single. - The career path that I've wanted since I was in primary school didn't work out. Resigned after 4 months. - Currently working a boring office job with no progression. - Lost 90% of my friends. - Not sure what my next career path should be? With my brother moving out, all my current friends living out of home with their fiancès/ girlfriends... It's really pushing me to just move to another state/ city and start fresh, find a new job and live on my own. But I'm not sure if I'm making another bad decision that might be a bit too rash. It just seems very appealing to just start a new life with a new job in a new city. Plus, I'm starting to feel a bit embaraased -26 year old man who still lives at home? It's what a friend of mine keeps pointing out anyway.