I am 53. I am heterosexual. My journey was easy. Society affirms men more than women and every bit of media i saw, affirmed how i felt and who i was. This was "normal". As messed up as autism made me in a lot of ways, sexuality and gender was obvious and easy.
I have one afab. He came out as pansexual at 15. I didn't care, i took an interest but was not concerned or worried.
This turned into non binary, with a name change for a year or so. Then he realised what he was, was trans. He's been trans about two years. Some of his older relatives dead name him and complain "she keeps changing her mind" but it's obvious to me that when you're outside the mainstream, when society doesn't affirm you, it's a harder journey with more stops on the way.
you'rea human being, with intrinsic value. Your gender is part of who you are, but it's not all of you. Just listen to what your feelings tell you, and be what feels right to you. There's never joy in rejecting how you feel to try to fit into some definition that society throws at you. Your friends will love you for you, either way. There are sadly always awful people in society but I've learned to simply ignore them. It's not worth the fight. Go where your joy is.
