Will I every be enough?

MaggiePie

Will I ever be enough?

I am not a good enough friend, I have no friends

i I am not a good enough mother, my children would be so much better off with someone else, one of my kids doesn’t even talk to me

i am not a good enough partner, I make my partner mad

I am not a good enough sister, my sisters cut me off 11 years ago

I am just not enough and wondering what the point in anything is. I try my best and it isn’t enough. It never will be.

I don’t know why I am posting this, I don’t have anyone to talk to so had to get it out in hope putting my feelings in words will stop my pain.

Sea_Turtle

Hey MaggiePie

I think perhaps you’re asking the wrong question, we all fall short in some way, whether it’s decisions we’ve made, things we’re not good at or could’ve done better. I don’t believe in perfect people.

You are definitely important though and the fact that you are worried about these things shows that you care deeply, which is a beautiful trait.

I don’t know what your situation is but I’m happy to chat on here if you need someone to talk to.
I remember when I first posted on here, I really just wanted some of the hurt to stop too. The aching of trying so hard and feeling like everything was still all wrong despite my effort was really hard.

You sound like you’re being really hard on yourself, which may not be helpful of me to point out, but you should know that perfect mothers, partners and sisters don’t really exist. The good ones are those that care even though they make mistakes.

melodica

When pain keeps showing up in close relationships, it can start to affect the way everything is interpreted. It sounds like there is a lot of self-blame, which makes sense that your thoughts come back to the same place when things feel unresolved. A child who does not speak, long-term distance from siblings, tension at home, and the absence of friendships all leave you feeling disconnected.

There is care in what you wrote. It shows in the way you measure yourself against how you want to be for others. That kind of care doesn’t disappear, even when the connection is strained or lost.