Twice the loss

[Katyonthehamsterwheel]

I was pregnant and lost my baby. Then two weeks later my partner left. I don't even know how I've held it together since. I don't have anyone. I am estranged from my family and I don't have any friends or a job, because I have bad anxiety. It was my anxiety that drove my partner away. I don't even blame him. But I'm just so sick of being alone. I literally feel sick from loneliness.

[Katyonthehamsterwheel]

Hi tess

Thankyou for recognizing my loss, and for understanding the loss of all the future hopes I had for our life together. I named her Zea. And I feel doubly sad that her 'Dad' moved on so quick as though she meant nothing, not just me. I still feel sad every time I see a bubba or think about how my belly should be big and it's not. At night I sleep with the teddy I bought for her. It brings me comfort. Not that I sleep much. Most of the time I'm just lying in the dark with ugly thoughts whirling about.

And yes it does help to post here. I don't have anyone to talk to and i feel like I need to talk. I wish I had family and friends to love and support me through this but I don't. I'm sorry you too are lonely. It's an awful thing, loneliness.