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Toxic relationship break up & weekend depression

soph33
Community Member

Hi guys!

As of late, I broke up with my boyfriend two months ago after 3 years. We had a toxic relationship and I couldn’t handle it anymore. I tried to give him another chance the other week but then all this anxiety came back all in one day and I ended up crying saying I couldn’t do it anymore. He never cheated but he would hide the truth and do things without thinking about my feelings. He has hurt me so much and now that I’ve broken up with him, I feel so down on the weekends that I just have no energy to do much. I’m not sure if it’s because I have been so emotionally and mentally drained of 3 years with him though.

I do well throughout the work week because I love my job and it gives me the motivation and happiness I want but when it comes to the weekend I feel alone. I don’t really want to go out drinking and partying because it’s not something that makes me feel better.

I love him so much still and all I think about is that he will meet another girl before I meet someone and he will be happier without me. It’s stupid but I can’t help but think that. I wasn’t enough to make him happy. So now I feel I have no confidence, I’m not interesting, I’m not pretty enough, I’m just me and nothing great. I feel because it was toxic that I sacrificed myself and now I don’t even know who I am, what I enjoy etc. where as he is able to go and spend time with his mates and be happy but I just don’t want to do that. I gave him everything of me and I feel so lost without him.

I guess I’m writing this to see if anyone else has experienced something similar and how they are coping today. This has been like no other relationship I ever had. I loved him more than I’ve loved anyone else. We have ended things on good terms which makes me happy but I just feel like I’m so boring and nothing good about me 😞

I hate weekends because I’m stuck with my thoughts and I constantly think he is out partying and meeting someone new. I feel a bit hopeless now.

13 Replies 13

Croix
Community Champion
Community Champion

Der Soph33~

Welcome back. The time taken to return doesn't matter, how you are getting along is the important thing.

Are you feeling more settled and confident in yourself now? Do the weekends loom as large?

Croix

soph33
Community Member

Hey Croix,

its been a long time since I’ve been on here and I thought I’d send a reply. I want to thank you for responding when I needed someone. A lot has changed since then, and I’m happy to say I’m much better. I do have a new partner who is phenomenal and words couldn’t describe how brilliant he is.

I’m not like I was before but there are still times I struggle. Memories, nightmares & overall health has been hard but I’m doing better. Thank you

Croix
Community Champion
Community Champion

Dear Soph33~

It is my turn to thank you, both for taking the trouble to come back and make contact, and that our responses have helped when you needed it, that makes all of us feel great.

I'm really delighted you have found a partner who is "brilliant"! Sounds to me like you can find the words to describe him after all:)

Please don't think that you are ending matters wiht this post, as you say there are still times of difficulty, you are welcome here anytime if you think our company could assist.

Croix

demonblaster
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

☺ hi soph and everyone

Wow so very happy for you 😀

It's so lovely to hear people reaching better times.

So often is the case one door closes and another opens. Possibly this happens more than people realise, they may not be aware of the new change as a result of happenings

Enjoy your happiness dear soph you deserve it ☺

🌱 new beginnings and change come with time that never stops.

🕊