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should I buy a cat before or after my mother dies?

Community Member


48y male living alone with only one family contact my birth mother who is not ill but i worry about her coughing and this bush file smoke had been very bad and still skies not clear

reason for thinking about getting a cat

i see them as narcissistic which should remind me of my mother

what is wrong with me

psychiatrist handed me his card with the word schizotypal written on the back

my file is currently being held at the hospital and i take my tablets

question though is fairly important to me as my little dog who replaced my last dog is current 10 and i had already decided no more dogs


i know a cat wont replace conversation that i have with my mum but i can look into its eyes and go through the motions of talking to it without getting negative reaction


i sometimes pray that she will outlive me so i wont feel the loss like i once did when my dad passed away years ago


i cant give more than that here


3 Replies 3

Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni

Hi Footprint

Welcome and thankyou for being on the forums with us too

I can feel sadness and pain in your post..I am one of many members of the forums (like yourself) that have posted due to having our own mental health problems and can be here for you

Its okay that you dont like cats....Can I ask how your mum is?

Would your mum want a cat for some company?

The forums are a safe and non judgemental place for you to post

I really hope you can post back as there are many gentle people that can be here for you


my mother is healthy and in her 70's i wont state age

we text each other every day mostly ie Watch SBS interesting or i just came in from hanging out towels

i dont hate cats no not at all it's just a comparison i see between a cat and my mother

i love my mother the only pain i feel is physical and i thinking about how a cat could maintain that same level of distance with communication

my mum has a dog and who is the one who doesn't want a cat

i mean no disrespect though i am not sure if this is the right place for me

sorry about misreading your post.....now I understand

I joined the forums in 2016 when I was at rock bottom with bad anxiety & depression..and meds...like yourself

to me you are a important part of the Beyond Blue forum family..Your posts are just as important as mine or anyone elses's here 🙂

sure...we dont have immediate message capability but I think you fit in really well 🙂

and thanks heaps too for helping out the members you have....Its always a bonus to have some experience on the forums

my kind thoughts and appreciation