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Sexual Health and the Idea of Never Having a Partner

Azzdog
Community Member

Hi everyone, I'm not sure how to put this but hopefully it will make sense.

I am a 24 year old male who currently is in therapy and sees a psychologist regularly. I have OCD, anxiety, depression, and autism, and when you put those all together, it becomes understandable why socialising is a major problem for me. One major cause of my current situation is the fact that I have never hd a girlfriend or had sex. Because we live in the digital age, it is almost impossible to avoid the fact that a lot of people are in relationships and that modern society is obsessed with the concept of sex. You would almost have to live on a deserted island in order to completely avoid all the triggers associated with it.

My cause of concern is that I have no one that I can relate to on this and that I feel like I struggle to articulate how bad it is for my mental health. My psychologist says that I am well in the normal distribution for young men but that doesn't really make me feel any better. Because I am shy, introverted, and have a lot of hobbies and interests that are not in line with contemporary society, I genuinely feel like I will never have a girlfriend, never have sex, and die alone. This fact alone has meant in the past 6 months, I have had 5 separate stints in a psychiatric ward due to concerns of my own safety. I was wondering if there are any other young men out there who feel the same way and are currently in the same boat, and if there are any young mens health groups around? I feel the latter would be important for me and reassure me that I am not the only one who feels this way.

846 Replies 846

I just want to feel, I want to feel emotions and actually have a sense of what its like to be human:
 
- I want to know what its like to be touched.
- I want to know what its like to be intimate with someone
- I want to know what its like to be held.
 
I am 30 freaking years old and I dont know what any of these feelings are like. 

 

at 30 I just went to a 'massage parlor' and payed for it

 

turns out they actually like their jobs and know what they're doing, good luck

I have definitely considered that though I worry I will feel pathetic paying for a service that others can just get for free based on having good social skills and a brain that is neurologically wired properly.

can the moderator just print this forum out and burn it? I hate it so much and I hate myself so much 

I was out at the cricket today and I am trying to enjoy it but it got absolutely ruined because of a couple being more showy than one would at the cricket. It made me feel of all the things I am missing out on:

 

- Companionship

- Physical touch

- Feeling loved and cared for

 

It sucks, it absolutely sucks and I hate the way I look, the way my brain is wired and how I just cant seem to get anywhere with women. I hate myself so much  

I need help, how do I get better at speaking and talking to women?

I have been looking through websites like relationships.org and maintaining healthy relationships and none of them provide the resources I need. I am a perpetually single man who cant get past a first date (even if I get on a date to begin with). Where are the resources for that? 

 

Honestly all of this is making me sadder and more depressed and less hopeful. I feel so ugly