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Secretive partner
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Hey guys, I’m in a Rutt at the moment in my 10 yr relationship with 3 kids and a house involved. My partner keeps lying to me about taking care of her part of the bills, it’s not the first time it’s happened and I’m at wits end trying to understand why it keeps happening, she will act as if everything of fine but then ill get notified that we are way behind in one of our bills I’m talking thousands in bill debts that I just thought she was taking care of. I’ve tried all differant approaches in trying to resolve this from a sensitive approach to now being firm, i said i think it’s time i take care of all the bills I will just need you to transfer some money each week to help, she took this as I was trying to control
her money. I said she really needs to setup a payment plan today and she said ok reluctantly, but I just get ignored over text if I ask how she went with it, like I said I’m at wits end and don’t really know which way to go, I couldn’t bare the thought of being away from my kids again as I’ve been through this before with my previous partner.
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hello and welcome.
I’m really sorry to hear what you’re going through. It sounds incredibly frustrating when trust and finances are involved. Balancing this and looking after your kids and home must be hard. From your post, it's sounds like you're trying your best to find a solution.
Sometimes, and unfortunately despite our best efforts, it can feel like we're hitting a wall. And we cannot make the other person do what something, even if it is the right thing to do.
I wonder whether you have you considered seeking outside help, like a couples counselor? They might be able to help navigate these tough conversations.
Listening...