hi Dee, I know how devastating this has been for you, and I say this after my 25 year marriage also finished a few years ago, well over 12 I think, but it's still a memory I hold close to my chest, and the questions you are asking yourself will probably remain unknown, because your spouse has made them and whether it had been talked about or not, still doesn't ease this almighty 'what if'.
There are reasons why this happened and it's up to you to tell us if you want, but for me maybe I should explain why ours finished, that may make you feel more comfortable.
My ex tried to help me overcome my depression over a few years, but I was self-medicating with alcohol and using this to think that it would help me, in hindsight it didn't, all it did was block the help I needed, so she divorced me because I wasn't getting better and she hated seeing me intoxicated.
I need to say that now I only drink socially for two reasons, I don't want to drink all the time and secondly I have to limit how much I drink because I certainly don't want to have a grand mal seizure.
I hope that you can get back to us, it's an anonymous and safe site so please feel comfortable coming back to us. Geoff.
