isolation and wanting to restart life

[hshs]

Hi all first time poster here

ive got alot going on so sorry if this post is long or is very vague im not the best at saying what i need to and my spelling is awful (sorry in advance)

ive been having issues at school regarding social isolation its currently the holidays at the time of posting and its still affecting me. in short most people at school will exclude me (i sound like a child saying this) i lost my friend group due to sticking up for someone who needed support. im at the point where my family doesnt want me to move to the school my very few friends are at. alot of things are going through my head at the moment. im even concidering becoming homeless so i can hopefuly start a better life authough it will be dificult. my family also will not let me drop out of school saying ill become useless. im really hoping i can find the best option that will mean all this stops and i can just live a good life and not have to deal with what school is currently throwing at me.
thanks in advance for your support,

hshs

[white knight]

Hi, welcome

Social isolation is a terrible feeling but we need to implement certain ideals and strategies, even a different frame of mind, a more mature thought pattern in order to do what is right for your schooling and the balance of friends.

So with that in mind, what is the purpose of school? Well is isnt to be with your friends, so that rules out moving to another school where, realistically falling out with friends there is also a possibility. So, focussing more on your school work and not on the social side of things - while at school with be a win- win situation because your grades will benefit, reports will get better and you wont be focussed on "friends". Imagine if you spent lunch time in the library instead of with toxic friends? and without your mobile tured on?

"Sticking up for friends". Well, your did stick up for a friend and the rest banished you from their group... well done. When that happens, those that banished you aren't worth having as friends. Try to make that distinction in every social group. It is always better to focus on the individuals of a group than the group itself including peoples behaviour in a group because as individuals they will be totally different people. And that person you stuck up for, they never forget that effort. You saved that friend from being bullied- how proud you should be!

There is a conflict here between "dropping out of school and living a good life" Obviously you believe that living a "good life" means not going to school whereas the truth is- continuing to go to school (to your maximum learning capacity) paves the way for a "better life". eg at 30yo friends that achieved a TAFE course or UNI or even year 12 will be earning far more and be in a challenging job whereas you might be in a factory on lowest income physically working hard. So try to see this from your parents point of view.

What might also help is to think about what work you would like to do, career. If you decide ok, I want to be a nurse... then it could be achieved a number of ways eg joining the defence where they train you on high wages and has excitement, starting off as a trainee nurse that might require lower entry education levels or studying biology at a higher level of education. My message is, once you decide, then you can focus on the education level needed to accomplish that.

I joined the Air Force at 17yo to learn radio technician and they trained me. So that might open up discussions to your parents as to the level you need to when you leave school. It's a plan that is better to swallow for them than "I just want to leave school".

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TonyWK