I'm so angry at my husband all the time and feeling unhappy *TRIGGER WARNING*

[be_yourself]

I'm so annoyed with my husband when he uses his mobile phone or computer and do Facebook/ Instagram/ anything related to the social media. My point of view, he's so addicted to it. He just has to have his mobile phone next to him and can't stop touching it. We have three year old daughter and she usually has to call her dad more than 5 times to make him notice her.

Another thing is he has very sweet tooth. He eats sweets all the time when he's home. I asked him not to eat in front of our daughter. But he just do it anyway. He eats chocolate, donut, chips, candy..... He's worse than two year old kids. He also eats very messy and he can't see it. Chocolate, and chips are always on the floor.

And the last (for today), he says house work is women's job. He doesn't vacuum, mop, wash dishes, cook meals.... Not at all. He's messier than our three year old daughter.

Oh one more thing, he doesn't know how to save money. He buys anything to our daughter. It's just so ridiculous to me. I've been telling him that small savings matter. Last 15 years, kept telling him to save money. Not happening even after having our baby. He's been always using credit card and now he tells me he has credit card debt that he struggle to paying back. We don't have a car. Still renting house...

So I'm very angry at him.

[uncut_gems]

Hi be_yourself,

Welcome to the forums. I'm sorry to hear that you're having problems at home– from my perspective it sounds like in addition to your husband failing to show common decency, the two of you also have very different ideas about parenting, financial planning, and personal comportment. These can be overcome, but they will require a lot of work and open, honest communication. Do you feel you are in a place where you could have at least an initial talk with your husband to acknowledge that there are problems that need addressing?

In the meantime, we're always here for you on the forums.

Warmly,

Gems

[be_yourself]

He harmed me

[Sophie_M]

Hi be_yourself, We are so sorry to hear that you have been harmed. From what you are saying, it sounds like you are experiencing domestic violence and we know it is very difficult to live with abuse. Please know that you are strong, valuable and you have a right to live free from harm. We are getting in touch with you privately to offer some extra support.

We would strongly urge that you contact 1800RESPECT. They offer confidential information, counselling and support 24/7 for people impacted by sexual assault, domestic or family violence and abuse. The lovely supportive counsellors have a lot of experience offering advice to people in your situation. You can contact them on 1800 737 732 or https://www.1800respect.org.au/ 

If ever you feel unsafe, please contact triple zero and ask for the police. 

You might be interested in reading the stories of others. Some threads you might be interested in reading include:

• "Moving on after leaving emotionally abusive relationship" -https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/online-forums/ptsd-trauma/moving-on-after-leaving-emotiona...
• "Trying to end an abusive relationship"https://healthyfamilies.beyondblue.org.au/seeking-support/helping-yourself-and-others/online-forums/...
• "Reset button"- https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/online-forums/ptsd-trauma/reset-button#qwRpXHHzvGGEbv8AAOn...

  Thank you for sharing this today, we know it may have taken courage. We hope that you can find some comfort in the forums and please feel free to keep us updated here on your thread throughout your journey whenever you feel up to it.

[CyP]

Hi be_yourself

I'm sorry to hear about what you are going through.
Domestic harm or disrespect of any form is not ok, and I am very concerned about your safety and wellbeing.
It sounds like you are navigating through a very delicate situation.

1800RESPECT as spohie_m recommended is a hotline for domestic violence , it might be helpful to keep this in your contact list along with other hotline/ services you already know .

Depending on your location, domestic violence resource centre has some additional support contacts that are national-wide and state-wide,
https://www.dvrcv.org.au/support-services

Hope you are able to find some resonance and ideas in the forum where people shared similar/relatable experiences . I wish some of these resources maybe of help , and can support you and your family through this very challenging circumstances.

This online community is here to listen whenever you need it , sending warm wishes over ...

CP

[be_yourself]

My husband threatened me again. He said I'd be deported. I don't have permanent Visa. He always threats me when we argue. I've lived here since 2004. My life is here. I don't want to lose my daughter. I want to be with her.

[geoff]

Hello _yourself, thanks for posting your comment and am so sorry for the situation you're in, but there is help out there for you, even though you're on a visa.

Can you please type this in your search browser 'husband harmed me but I'm on a visa what do I do' as there are many ways to help you.

Family and domestic violence is not acceptable under any circumstance and you don't have to remain in a relationship where you fear for yourself and your daughter to be able to stay in Australia.

There are many different types of protection orders listed in what I've given you to search, they may only vary from State to State.

'The Australian Government has zero tolerance for family and domestic violence against
anyone, including permanent or temporary visa holders.'

Have a look as I don't know what State you are in, but please ask any question/s you are unsure of, we will be here to help you.

Best wishes.

Geoff.

[be_yourself]

My husband called police. Because I said I had to take my daughter with me to my home country when my Visa expires. So I called the police as well. I was so scared that my daughter was taking away from me. I'm so angry at him. I've been so angry. I don't know how I can let this ager go. I can't forgive him. He hit me he threats me. My daughter is so sad and so hurt. She screamed and cried. I feel terrible. She thinks I leave without her. Now she has anxiety that I would be gone.. She didn't want me to go out without her few days ago. She cried and said "Don't go. Don't leave me!!" It just breaks my heart..