I’m lonely and never been in a relationship

[FluffyPotato]

I’m 26 and gay, I’ve tried and tried to find someone to spend my life with but every attempt is met with pushbacks or me getting hurt apparently I’m too nice to date, I have one best friend and she’s been in a relationship for awhile now every time I see her I feel like I’m not progressing in life especially when she talks about her partner. I always try to talk to her about how hard it is to find someone and I’m always met with “you have to love yourself”

I'm a really shy guy and not outspoken at all I feel like that is what is holding me back so I’ve been trying to get help (anti depressants & psychologist) I’ve been on antidepressants for a very long time as I was bullied at lot in school for being gay

im not sure what to do because I’ve never been the confident guy and I feel like that is not who I am but I fear that is what everyone get turned off by 

I need some advice I’ve tried clubbing, dating apps, just waiting for someone to come along but none of it has worked I’m not the hookup guy I generally like to get to know someone because personality comes first before anything else 

I’m sorry for the spelling mistakes I’ve been good at writing 🙂

[smallwolf]

Hello and welcome.

I’m really sorry to hear that you’re feeling this way, and I can imagine how discouraging it must be to keep trying and not get the results you hope for. It sounds like you’ve been through a lot, and it’s understandable to feel frustrated and uncertain.

Please know that being shy or not outspoken doesn’t make you any less deserving of love and connection. It’s hard when others make it seem like confidence is the key to finding a relationship...but you don’t need to change who you are to find someone who appreciates you for you.

Your approach of wanting to get to know someone on a deeper level is so valuable, even if it feels like that’s hard to find. It’s great that you’re seeking help, and while the journey may be long, taking care of your mental health is important too.

Everyone’s path is different, and yours is valid.

Listening...

PS. Don't worry about any mistakes in your writing. What's more important is you writing about what you are going through. And I understood that.

[FluffyPotato]

Thank you for your response when I was reading I felt a lot of weight lifted off my shoulders I can’t thank you enough for that and for me to not change who I am for anyone 

[smallwolf]

All good. You can only be who you are and that is (/should be) enough. Acceptance can be difficult. You have to trust me there... something I struggle with. Sometimes we just have to search for our tribe  ....