SarahT14,
Thank you so much for reaching out to us, welcome to the forums. I'm sorry to hear that you're going through such a difficult situation, it seems like this is really taking a toll on you.
It sounds like you may have already had several conversations with your husband about how his behaviour is affecting you, but the outcome may have been that he either doesn't change or maybe changes for a little while then resorts back to the same behaviour. Either way, it sounds to me like you're not getting the love and respect that you deserve. I can't even imagine the hurt and betrayal you're feeling right now.
Firstly, have you confided in any loved ones about how you're feeling? It can really help to have the support and insight from people who know you well and can help you out, if you feel like leaving is the best and safest option for your wellbeing.
If you feel comfortable, it may also be worthwhile having a chat to a GP, therapist, or psychologist who can give you some professional insight to help support you in whatever you decide to do. In the meantime, 1800RESPECT is a good resource to look into for a confidential chat with somebody who can talk with you about what you're going through.
Just know that it's not your fault at all. Sometimes people we've loved for a long time do things to hurt us, and we're left to make a decision about when it may be time to leave. It sounds like you're currently grappling with that decision, and we're here to support you regardless.
If you decide this is something you'd like to work through, it's best to have a plan in advance of how you can preserve your wellbeing. If you do decide to go, a plan may also be necessary to make sure you're protected financially, emotionally, legally, and physically with shelter, love and all the essentials.
Please feel free to keep chatting with us if you'd like, we're here to support you.
Kindest regards, SB
