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How Do You Get Out There?

Guest_0753
Community Member

Can someone tell me what I would be doing wrong when I can't ever get a boyfriend or go out with friends. I am a more introverted person who works and stays at home as my two social places apart from shopping. What and where do you meet these sort of people and why does it seem to come so easily and naturally to other people to get someone special? Is it to do with the fact I don't have those Jlo looks , not obvious enough with flirting

What has worked for someone in the past?

23 Replies 23

Hi,

I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to cause any offense, all I meant was that you needed to spend less time in your head thinking about things and more time doing things/getting out there. We’re all guilty of that, myself included, so I didn’t mean for that to come across as me criticizing you 😞 like the others said, I think you just need to cultivate some interests and the rest will follow

ecomama
Valued Contributor
Valued Contributor

Dear LMO

How are you doing today?

I wanted to share a podcast with you that my eldest daughter is laughing alot about atm...

It's called "Why don't you want to date me?" by the comedian Nicole Byer.

Apparently it shows the MEN'S side and is hilarious.

Thinking of you
EM

Hi, not doing so good and I don't care. I am angry and frustrated. I don't look at podcasts, Never have. I got hurt that hit me deep when this person goes do you have a social life? boyfriend? friends? what's it to her? I have never spoken to her about anything and she thinks she can magnify glass me like that. Nuh uh. I don't even like them anyway. I feel like saying to her it is people like her that holds me back from doing anything apart from putting my head and working, going grocery shopping by myself, and staying home. Keep your nose out of it, smart alleck. Even now, there is nothing for me to do and I can't message anyone to do anything.

ecomama
Valued Contributor
Valued Contributor

Oh dearest LMO

That person seemed to push into your private life where it was none of her beeswax... yuck.

It seems to have triggered you?

I'm so sorry LMO sometimes we get hurt when it wasn't another person's intention to hurt us..
do you think she intended to hurt you or was trying to reach out and connect with you more?

But whatever... if you don't like her, then it is what it is.

Have any of the above suggestions sparked a thought or 2 about how you may want to move forward?

Thankyou for posting again and sharing how you're feeling today.

Love EM

The thing is I don't want to connect with this person, I don't feel comfortable with them and it has been like that since I met them. I will be polite to her. She said she was being "motherly" but I feel like saying I do not see you as a mother because I am not into you and I felt like she was embarrassing me on purpose. She was not being sensitive. It is the ones I do like that never say things like this to me and I do like them. I know if I had the guts I could be down right rude if I wanted to. No, nothing ever sparks anything, I can't be bothered with it.

Because of all this, I just feel really let down and upset that my life is NOT the way it should be and everyone is allowed to do whatever they want without anyone caring and yet when it comes to me, I am not allowed to do anything or offend anyone. I hate all those toxic people you can't please, Why can't I be open for once and express how I feel without feeling guilty or anything? I wish I could have a social life overnight but I will not happen. All I feel like doing is sleeping forever

Guest909
Community Member

Hi EM

"Why don't you want to date me?" by the comedian Nicole Byer.

I tried to listen to the podcast but gave up after about 5 minutes. I must be getting old!

cheers

Hi Little Miss Overthinker,

We're sorry to hear that you're feeling so distressed by this interaction. It must be difficult to feel that you can't please anyone, and it's concerning to hear that you feel you want to sleep forever.

Can we ask if you are currently accesing any mental health support? If you would like some help finding mental health support, we would recommend that you get in contact with the Beyond Blue Support Service. They are available 24/7 by phone on 1300 22 4636 or on Webchat 3pm-12am AEST on our website: www.beyondblue.org.au/getsupport  One of our friendly counsellors will be able to talk through these feelings with you and can offer support, advice and referrals.

If you're feeling distressed and need to talk this over with someone more immediately, please know that you get in touch with our friends at Lifeline (13 11 14) or the Suicide Call Back Service (1300 659 467).

If you would like to post further, please tell us more about what's on your mind and how we can best help you get through this tough period.

I only mean go to sleep!! I cant go out with anyone, I can't ask or initiate it, I get awkward and I hate it when I feel insulted

Hi little miss overthinker you kind of sound just like me as I like to all it I’m a single Pringle not to mention I have a fear of later on in life being one of those crazy old cat ladies with like a 100 cats for company. And if I ever say anything that upsets/offends you ect ect ect please let me know as I rather people would so I can try fix things. So in other words I’d rather people be honest and upfront with me.