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Feeling like a cloud is over me after breakup

Rbarts
Community Member

Hello all hope you're doing well over the holidays,

This started just over a week ago when my girlfriend of 7 months broke up with me. She said her mental health wasn't great and didn't want it to affect me on top of a few other things (not enough in common, two too different people), and it was a one-sided but mutual breakup and we still wanted to be friends. The week that followed was terrible and I was constantly doubting myself and what I could have done better to prevent it as well as remembering everything that was good during the relationship and missing it. I would overthink everything and contradict myself (thinking I was alright, to I want her back, to I want to be friends), this made me feel sick and exhausted all while I was messaging her. I eventaully told her all this and other things I felt and decided to put some distance between us and stop messaging for a bit. That helped and felt like a weight lifted off for a bit. But now I'm slowly getting this feeling of anxiety and something I cant describe. I'm now worried about if I made a mistake, I constantly think about what shes thinking, if she has already moved on and is talking with someone and that our 7 months together meant nothing. I constantly wish she would try and ask how im going or reach out to me again. At the same time I'm trying to reassure myself that it's fine and I'm enough and I'll find someone new when I'm ready. It's getting exhausting again and I miss being happy before all this.

I've tried distracting myself with learning piano, working out and watching shows but it's not helping in the long run and I dont know how to cope with it. I just want my headspace to be how it was when it as good and not full of negative thoughts, doubts and imaginary scenarios.

7 Replies 7

jaz28
Community Champion
Community Champion

Hi there,

This feeling is relatively normal after a breakup - grieving what was lost is a normal human reaction and it is not easy. Grief can be really hard to get over, but I found that time is the greatest healer at this. You just have to give it time and distract yourself. No contact with your ex is also best if you want to move on.

If you feel necessary, seeing a GP & therapist could also help give you some extra support.

I am sorry, break-ups are tough.

Feel better soon,

Jaz.

Rbarts
Community Member
I've been considering a therapist but they are out of my price range as a student living at home, being $100 a session I can't justify spending that much even if I want to.

jaz28
Community Champion
Community Champion

Rrbarts,

I would consider seeing your GP first, you can get a mental health care plan that will give you some sessions with a psychologist that are covered by medicare. Could you try that?

jaz28
Community Champion
Community Champion

Here is a link to some more information about it

https://www.healthdirect.gov.au/mental-health-treatment-plan

Rbarts
Community Member
Oh I never realised, I'll have a look. Thanks heaps

Rbarts
Community Member
I just saw though that to be eligible you need to have a mental health disorder. I feel as though I don't have one, just poor mental health temporarily so I don't think it would work out. Thanks for the suggestion though.

jaz28
Community Champion
Community Champion

All good

you could always speak to your GP and ask if they would consider doing this for you.

i hope things improve !