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Dating an old friends ex

Von is lost
Community Member

A girl who used to be a somewhat good friend broke up with her boyfriend 7 months ago now, and we used to sometimes hang out all three of us together. I lost touch with the friend before they broke up. The boyfriend and I became friends like 2-ish months ago but it’s beginning to feel more like we want to date each other. Am i a bad person for even considering it, and should i stop it in its tracks. Or is it okay to explore? I want to be honest with the girl i used to be friends with but don’t know how to go about it 😢

3 Replies 3

Community Champion
Community Champion

Dear Von is lost~

I'd think you were more likley to be a bad person if you considered this ex-boyfriend was some sort of possession of the sometime friend girl and felt you were infringing on her "territory".


The girl in question and her boyfriend broke up, and that was their decision. If you are now enjoying the ex-boyfriend's  company and you are feeling you would like to date then I'd suggest talking it over. It does not have to be anything heavy, a light suggestion perhaps. I gives him the chance to say how he feels, and if he has any prior commitments. It's a matter of respect as much as anything else.


As for if you should - why not? You may be well matched and happy together.


As you have already lost touch with the sometime friend girl I'm not sure you need to do anything there


You are welcome to talk things here more if you would like



that’s really good advice thank you. I agree with what you have said. I initially thought the same and didn’t feel bad about it but one of my close friends thinks it’s a little bit suss which has made me question my actions/intentions.

Community Champion
Community Champion

Dear Von is hopefully-not-quite-so-lost-now~

I'm glad it helped, your original instincts were pretty good, but sometimes one can be too close and that can cloud the issue.


I hope things work out well


(Sorry about the name-change:)