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conflicted

KyAn
Community Member
Hello, the other night my partner came home from work. Lately he has been drinking a lot of beer and now he is coming home drinking small amount of beer, smoking weed and now has taken up smoking cigarettes again. We have been having problems due to the excessive drinking and recently took up smoking weed with it. Not a good combo.

Apart from our relationship issue, he has had issue with his family too. I see that his thinking is distorted. For the other night I came out of bedroom to say Can you please turn music down. In his heightened reply He says We need to talk. He feels I need to go back north for a while, as us living together isn't working out, or we will break up. I cried by saying I have been thinking same only short term thou, so I can see my mum and take a small break too. My partner is wanting his space and he doesn't want to bother me and he feels it will help our relationship. I said this is my home too and I do love it here.

I really think his attitude has changed with us due to combo of weed and alcohol. As I notice these things do not last very long with him.

I discussed further last night and he says Look just give it a try and if it works it works and if it doesn't then come back. I do want a break but want to feel I can be with my partner too, like he also wanting me to be here. I think he wants me gone for a while so he can go nuts on drinking, smoking weed, inviting people over, andhe is 38 years of age.

I feel really conflicted with whats going on and starting to feel unwanted, and depressed, anxious of this. As last year our relationship very strained because of drinking.

In Law of Attraction to focus on what I want and I have been. As I want my partner to come back to earth and want to be with me in a mature way.
2 Replies 2

geoff
Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni
hello KyAn, thanks for coming to the site, because what you have said means that your partner is not only making his beer, smoking and weed smoking his way of self medicating himself, in other words to try and cover up any problems between the two of you and that's not a good solution.

If he wants you to go north to see your mother then perhaps it's a great excuse to invite all his friends over to do what they want to do, but that's not solving any problems in your r/ship, he is pushing you away and this will make it much harder for you to return home.

I am about to log off as I start very early, but have written down your name, but concerned about what you have told us because your partner has so much to overcome.

I must admit that I was the same as he is, except I didn't smoke weed, but I always wanted my wife to take our 2 boys somewhere so that I could have time by myself, not to invite any friends around but to be by myself so that I could drink, now I only drink socially as we are now divorced. Geoff.

KyAn
Community Member

Thanks Geoff for your understanding. It is an assumption on my part to think he wants to invite people over. He is approaching 40 and hangs out with some 20 year olds.

He thinks if we work and save towards our goal in purchasing land is focus.

Can he have cognitive impairment.