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Bullying and Sleep Deprivation
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Hi all. My husband has been a FIFO worker for the past 12 years. I have been a stay-at-home mum to our four children. As they grew, I worked part-time. Every break, my husband drinks heavily and plays loud music all night. He sings loudly and insults me and my children. My three older children have moved out and the youngest remains. I started a full-time job recently and his behaviour has escalated to become physically aggressive and threatening. I can barely function at work and have begged him to cease his behaviour, but he claims to not remember his behaviour whilst 'drunk.' I have complained to his workplace but they have not taken me seriously. My husband is abusive, uses foul language and calls me and my children terrible names. Myself and even my neighbours previously reported him and he has been arrested only to be released the following day, and he continues his behaviour. I don't know what to do, and my mental health is adversely affected.
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You seem to be dealing with a Jekyll & Hyde - and 'Mr Hyde' is the blind drunk without self control.
Your requests for changes have been ignored (actually 'denied' on grounds of amnesia), so the best thing to do when husband starts drinking is to pack a bag for you and your son and head to a friend's place or motel.
Perhaps his recognising you will only engage with the civil 'Dr Jekyll' will present the severity of your concerns (and the risk of extended absence) where, if handled together, you can better provide support to your husband who is clearly struggling with his own crisis from the present work/life imbalance.
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Hi Sleepless19
I understand there are heaps of underlying issues with domestic violence, (yes, that is what you are copping).
Is there anyone, thinking professional, you can speak to with a view to leaving the situation?
If he's like that every time he's home, maybe it's time you started thinking of yourself, your health and that of your child.
We all stay for all the wrong reasons. Please seek some help. Take care of you.
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Hi Sleepless,
I have only just seen your post and hope that you are well.
I have been and am still in a domestic violence and abusive marriage.
I had police and courts intervene and they helped with an AVO. This kept my husband away for a while. That was in 2020.
I am back living in our family home with our son however I don’t like him and we are merely housemates.
Unfortunately, they made need help from the courts to stop his abusive behaviour towards you.
He definitely needs help with his alcohol abuse.
Good luck and remember that you can do better without him. Fiatlux 🙏🏼