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Am I depressed

TLD
Community Member

Hi I am a 22 year old male who is in a current relationship of 5 years and have 2 children.

I work full time in a very physically and draining job. I come home and I'm always tired and even tired at work even though I get a solid sleep. I feel as if though people are always judging me and that I am mentally drained. I don't feel good enough for her, feels like we have nothing in common. I feel very private and I can't talk about our relationship or anything. I get jealous very easily and I always seem down as in feeling like she can do better. When I get home from work all I want to do is just stay home on weekends and do nothing as it feels as if though I never get to relax, some days I feel suicidal but I wouldn't go and do anything as I think of my kids and what it would be like for them to not have a father I feel always tired, always sad and pissed off and it's really effecting those around me. I think I could have depression but I don't know what depression feels like and I don't have anyone to talk to. Is there anyone that could tell me about some symptoms

3 Replies 3

Boo1986
Community Member

Hi TLD,

It is impossible for me to know as I'm not a professional and have never met you, but that does sound like depression to me. I would recommend going to see you doctor and speak to him/her about your symptoms (both physical and mental) and ask to be referred to a Psychologist or a counsellor just to have a chat at first. Then you can perhaps find out if they think you have depression and also they can make a plan for how you can feel better.

You are still very young and communicating about your feeling can be really hard, but I think you should try to talk to your partner about how you are feeling. Just be honest an open and encourage her to do the same. Sometimes relationships can fall apart because each person is wondering what is going on with the other person and start to worry and stress about things based only on assumptions. For example, you feel that you are not good enough for her, but if you speak to her about it, she may reassure you that she would never want anyone else. When you hear this it may help to take away your worries and help you not to feel jealous.

If you have help from a psych and support from your partner, things will definitely start to get better.

You have taken a big step by opening up about your feelings here, keep it up 🙂 don't be afraid to be honest with people you trust. The more you talk about your feelings the more you will feel understood and won't end up feeling isolated and alone.

hope everything works out 🙂

Wednesday
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

Hello and welcome TLD,

I'm really pleased you came to the forum it's a great place to chat and work through things. There are many
people with lots of experience to help out too. Just in case you haven't noticed there is also the chatline 1300 22 4636 available 24/7 or the Suicide Call back Service (1300 659 467). You are not alone!

You are clearly exhausted with a lot of responsibility and may you have other things happening as Boo said its a good idea to visit your GP and have a chat.

If you go to the top of the page and hit 'The facts' tab then look for the K10 checklist you can run through the questions and it will help you work through how depressed / anxious you are feeling. Maybe you could print it off and take it to your GP's as a conversation starter?

Can you try and share with your partner how you are feeling as Boo said she may also be in a tough place? two young children would be quite a handful too. Are able to get any support from family or friends?

It is tough but every baby step helps. Please look after yourself. Come back and chat and let us know how you are going.

Warm regards.

Starwolf
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

Hi TLD, welcome to the forums.

Kudos to you for acknowledging there is a problem and reaching out to share your concerns. A brave move...

Depression is a medical condition, regardless of the fact it involves the mind instead of the body. It must be regarded and treated as such. Getting a proper diagnosis would be a brave, sensible first step towards recovery.

To help you figure what you are up against, you can scroll down to the bottom of this page and read about "The Facts". You will find there a checklist for anxiety/depression. But physical/mental exhaustion could also be a big part of your problems. An issue cannot be managed unless we know exactly what is involved.

Honest communication is the essence of every relationship. Sometimes, a neutral third party like a counselor is necessary to facilitate it. If you find face to face conversation too daunting, you could write down your thoughts, feelings and concerns and hand this over to your partner in letter form. Writing helps clarify your thoughts to yourself first. A letter can be edited as many times as necessary. It can also be read and re read at leisure, which makes it easier to process than spoken words. It also avoids emotional outbursts that can get in the way of communication. You could ask your partner to reply in writing if it makes it easier for you.

Meanwhile, navigating the forums will give you access to more relevant info, allow you to connect or release some of the pressure. There's no need to struggle alone...it is way too difficult.

Good to have you on board.