I am struggling.
My girlfriend is pregnant, we live together and are mature aged.
She's from overseas and all her family and support is back in her country. She has lived in Australia about 5 years. She has always wanted a baby, I was unsure but our relationship built up strong and I changed my mind. She has got depression through her pregnancy, she is struggling to sleep, regularly feeling down. She has got a mental health care plan and will go and see someone when she can get in.
Through our pregnancy, I have been extremely supportive. I have gone to every appointment, I have changed a lot, we go for walks after work together, been doing a lot more of the cooking, housework, trying to make things as easy for her as I can. I have tried to change my lifestyle, I used to stay up late and I have more regularly gone to bed early to spend time with her. She wanted a massage each night before sleep and I obliged most nights.
Recently though I feel more like I am being pushed away. I feel she is absorbed with her and pregnancy while our relationship (and me) doesn't get any attention. I can't do the right thing, I do 9 things right but then she finds the 1 little thing I miss and I am a bad person. She has been a bit mean to me, had arguments with me about little things even when she knows she is wrong, continues anyway. It's really hard for me because I feel everything that she wants/asks for I am there to help out and it is getting thrown back into my face.
She will be emotional and push me away, then get upset because that is apparently a sign she wants me close and to hug her - But I don't feel like I want to hug because I am pushed away.
I have lost emotional connection, we used to cuddle in bed, now there is a giant pregnancy pillow between us, I did go to the other side of the bed and cuddle her a few times and it was nice, but now I don't really care. I feel undervalued and she doesn't really come to me for any emotional stuff to make me feel loved. I have talked to her about some of these things but nothing has really changed.
I really don't know what to do, I am wondering if it is best to let her go back to her country -
I feel no matter how much I do, I can't do the right thing anyway and her family support is something I can't provide. I love her enough to sacrifice myself for her wellbeing.
The huge downside is, it would be goodbye and I won't get to be part of the pregnancy or my baby's life.
I am a student so can't afford my own place.
