Unsure best steps

Patches63 · ‎25-06-2023

Hi, I’m new to the forums and think I may have PTSD. When I was about 9 my dads only brother committed suicide in his family home. When I was about 11 my mums youngest sister died of heart attack as side effect effect of MS and for long time I struggled to deal with her death. Within the following couple years my remaining grand parents both died and my dad had a stroke that saw him become physically and verbally abusive. When I was 16 my mum and I fled family home and did not return for approx 4years which was after my dad was in long term medical care. 23 December 2006 my mum took heart attack in my arms and didn’t survive, not long after I thought about suicide, went to gp who referred me to physc at some stage. I was discharged from his care after approx yr. November 2019 I was involved in near fatal car accident on my way home from visiting my husband in oncology ward due to truck verging into my lane. Lots of things that happened when I was a teenager with my dad I don’t remember or feels like I’m only watching. I have panic attacks when driving near trucks. I have recently sold my home and am having flashbacks in my sleep of aftermath of my uncles suicide. Can calmly write these words as if didn’t happen to me and other times can’t stop crying

Bob_22 · ‎26-06-2023

Hi Patches63,

Welcome to the forums and thank you for sharing. You have been through so much for a single life time and are very strong for sharing and doing your best to get through things. Don't underestimate your resilience.

You should know that if you are in crisis or ever need to talk to someone you can always contact the counsellors at beyond blue at any time by going to: https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/talk-to-a-counsellor

It is not for us to say whether you have PTSD but I would say it is definitely worth getting a professional's opinion. If you have a GP this would be a great place to start as they can refer you to a psychologist or psychiatrist. In terms of the traumas you have been through, they would definitely be experiences that affect your current and future mental health. You can learn strategies such as mindfulness and diversional thinking to cope with these traumas but that comes with time, practice and professional expertise. Here is some information from the BB website about PTSD: https://www.beyondblue.org.au/mental-health/anxiety/types-of-anxiety/ptsd

In the meantime please come back here to update us on how you're going or to simply vent.

Hope that helps.

Bob

Patches63 · ‎26-06-2023

Thanks for that information plus your words of encouragement. I know I need help to deal with upsetting memories in my head and associated emotions, didn’t know where to start this time.

Not long after my mum died through supports through my work I worked with a counsellor who really helped me a lot to understand things, taught me lots of coping mechanisms and helped me become aware of some things that was affecting my mental health that I wasn’t aware of.

I retired from work about a year ago from a toxic work environment. Couple months later started making enquiries into moving to a nearby lifestyle village to increase my currently limited social interactions plus be in a secure community environment. Since then there has been some positives things but more negative things happen. After dealing with 2 different real estate agents and trying to sell my home since February my house has now been sold few days ago. It doesn’t feel real. I’m still expecting something to go wrong again.

couple months after my husband died I adopted 2 cats who are now 3 year old and mean the world to me. I live alone and would feel totally lost with my cats. They both sense when I’m not feeling well and never leave my side, quite often have one on my knees and other curled up beside me.

Bob_22 · ‎29-06-2023

Hi Patches63,

Thanks for the update. Congratulations on selling your house, I hope your new home brings about the positive change you're hoping for. I'm so sorry to hear about your husband. I can't imagine the amount of grief you experience on top of everything else you mentioned. A great resource I can recommend who provide support and advice for anyone experiencing grief is griefline.org.au. They are a great service also: https://griefline.org.au/

Keep us posted.

Bob

Patches63 · ‎29-06-2023

Have appointment with local gp tomorrow to get some unrelated test results and to request referral for some professional help. Saw a professional about 15yrs ago with whom I had good rapport from first appointment. He helped me understand various things I’d been struggling with including an incident that was having negative impact on my mental health that I didn’t realise I was doing. Impossible to start to heal when don’t realise was harbouring grief since childhood.

im looking forward to getting some help from some one again. Have times when I feel happy but want to feel happier with myself again and to be able to enjoy life again. Saw counsellor not long after my husband was diagnosed with cancer in hope of discussing coping mechanisms etc. each session all counsellor wanted to do was discuss how my week had been. I ceased going after few sessions as felt disillusioned. The encouragement from my couple posts has been very much appreciated. Getting involved in the social forums, especially the cafe, is being beneficial. Starting to remember so many fun and enjoyable times pre teen has helped me feeling better within myself

Patches

Bob_22 · ‎29-06-2023

Hi Patches63,

Thanks for the update. It's great to hear your involvement in the forums and the cafe has been beneficial. I hope your appointment tomorrow goes well also. 🙂

Bob