Hey FlowerEarthAngel,
Sorry to hear that you have been through a lot. You are not alone however. After having gone through so much, it can and is often difficult to begin socialising again. I experienced this too after suffering from depression and anxiety for quite a few years. Unfortunately, it isn't as easy and just going out and feeling comfortable.
You mention you suffer from PTSD and chronic pain. Have you had these issues addressed or discussed with health professionals? Are you taking medication to relieve you from some of the chronic pain you experience? I believe it is extremely important to seek assistance regarding your chronic pain and particularly your PTSD as addressing these underlying issues will make you feel better about yourself, about life and about your future. You may wish to explore the options of seeing a psychologist or a psychotherapist and discussing your concerns if you are comfortable doing so.
It is completely normal and understandable to not want to share what you have been through. Talking about your concerns with people with shared experiences (group therapy) might be something you also wish to consider. Discussing your experiences with other people who have been through a similar experience can be an extremely successful method of treatment/recovery and I would encourage you to give group therapy a go. You would also be able to meet new people and form positive relationships with people who have similar experiences to you.
Things will get better and there are many services out there who would love to hear from you and who are able to assist you. If you would like to provide us with information relating to which state/city you live in, I would be able to suggest some agencies/providers who you may wish to get in contact with and discuss your concerns with.
Hope this helps.
Look forward to hearing back from you.
All the best,
Nick.
