Past domestic violent relationship ruining my life

[Missunderstood1]

TW. Hi I’m new here. Not really sure where to start. I’m 28 and have been in a Dv relationship in each of my relationships throughout my life.. the most recent in 2020 I was hurt physically the worst, was left with a black eye temple bruising head bruising and serious leg trauma. And ivo was put in place and the night it happened he made an application to get one on me. The whole thing is consuming my life. I feel like I’m a walking zombie. Living life but not really here… I’ve been on meds since I was 18. I don’t know what to do…

[Sophie_M]

Hi Missunderstood1,

Welcome to the forums and thank you for sharing your story with us here.

We are sorry to hear that you have been through so much in your past relationships and that you feel like they are still consuming your life. We understand this must be such an awful situation to be in and want to remind you that you never have to go through this alone, and support is always here for you.

If you would like to talk to someone, the Beyond Blue Support Service is available 24/7 by phone on 1300 22 4636 or on Webchat 1pm-12am AEST on our website: www.beyondblue.org.au/getsupport  One of our friendly counsellors will be able to talk through these feelings with you and can offer support, advice and referrals.

We would recommend that you get in touch with an organisation called Relationships Australia on 1300 364 277 who provide relationship support services for individuals, families and communities.

We hope that you will find some comfort here on the forums. Please feel free to keep reaching out here on your thread whenever you feel up to it.

[white knight]

Hi, welcome

It's really confusing for us all, wondering why we do what we do, choosing a certain sort of person to be our partner eg potentially violent types but essentially we beat ourselves up for it when, it isn't our fault. What is our fault is to continually repeat actions and no learn from our mistakes.

By posting here you are taking the first real leap towards improving your choices. Eg to learn to choose wiser next time. It would be advantageous to accept that time heals.

Boosting your confidence is also good to exercise. Pat yourself on the back for surviving, for posting here and being the good person you are.

I hope that helps

TonyWK

[missep123]

Hi Missunderstood1,

I am so sorry to hear that you have been through that. I really wish I knew exactly what to say but I wanted to post on here to show you some support.

Have you ever been to any support groups? From what I have heard being around others in a safe space supporting each other can make you feel heard and not alone.

Please keep us updated though because we want to really be here for you

[Missunderstood1]

Hi there I’ve never been to a support group but that sounds actually really helpful!
Thankyou for your reply!

[white knight]

Hi again

Just wondering if you saw my post or missed it?

TonyWK

[Mum Chris]

Hi,

Its hard to make changes and move into a more stable life when coming out of DV situations. I recommend contacting DV support line and getting help. They are trained to I help and can offer accommodation and counseling.
You didn’t get into this situation on your own and your not expected to get out of the the situation on your own. Seek help and take advantage of the support.
DV erodes at self esteem and makes it very hard to cope with daily life.
Keep posting on here and seek help and don’t look back.

❤️‍🩹

MC

[geoff]

Hello Missunderstood, I'm really sorry o learn of this because it must have been so frightening for you.

I really dislike DV and it's not uncommon for an IVO to be taken out on you, once you have done this on them.

Can I ask who has access to the house, as this can affect how you can overcome this.

Hope to hear back from you.

Geoff.