Is recovery from PTSD even possible?

[LeahSeekingHope]

Hi all

I struggle with PTSD, depression and anxiety.

I had a very toxic upbringing in a cult with emotional and physical abuse, including neglect from a lack of nutrition and being denied education.

I am now in my late 20's and I cannot think of a year I have not existed through that has not involved one trauma or another. Frequent Homelessness, bullying, sexual assault, grief and loss, social isolation, abusive relationships. These are just some of the things.

I have engaged with psychologists over the years but haven't found a way to come to terms with my trauma.

Currently I am on a low dose of anti-anxiety medication which takes the edge off and enables me to get out of bed to go to the toilet but I still struggle to leave the house unless I have been drinking. I self medicate on alcohol a fair bit.

I have limited family support but I do have a support worker who sees me once a week and a good GP.

I would like to be a contributing member of society and I'd like an occupation. But I feel numb and devoid of passion and I also have very low self worth, and have no motivation at all to care about myself, almost to a point I'm afraid of caring for myself. I did used to have a fight inside me to get past all the really bad things but I seem to have lost it and I don't know how to get it back.

I live in regional WA so services are limited. I don't know how to move past all of this numbness and paralysing fear, this apathy and lack of motivation. I see a psychologist but I can only see him once a month due to his availability.

If anyone has any ideas I would be open to them.

Cheerio, L

[Franklin88]

Hi LeahSeekingHope

You're in a tough situation made harder by being in regional WA but there's always a way around any obstacle!

I too self medicate with alcohol even though I know all it does is make things worse in the long run. How do you feel after you've been drinking?

Have you tried any medication or relaxation techniques? There are a lot of good apps available for smartphone including Smiling Mind and Calm, alternatively you can find a lot of guided meditation videos on youtube.

It sounds really basic and it is, but you could also try and find the small things that make you happy and focus on being in the moment while you are doing them.

[Like_a_diamond]

Hi Leah,

Your so incredibly strong to reach out and want to work through things. I have found that talking to a professional that specialises in PTSD in particular to be more helpful. You may be able to find one who would skype with you and if you are on a health plan - be covered by Medicare.

What I have learned is in a traumatic event, an individual who has developed PTSD has had their mind split in a particular way as a way of processing and protecting you from whats happened. Depression and anxiety are secondary reactions - its the PTSD that is the culprit. The reactions that happen from the PTSD are from this side - which if you can imagine is very primal. A way of healing is to re-examine your thoughts as they happen (if coming from the PTSD(primal) or Logic) and challenge the PTSD ones.

For example - with self care. What thoughts are happening that stop you from self care? Can you then pick them out individually and challenge them from a logical point of view.

Never forget you are an amazing person who has been experiencing some pretty horrendous things. You have the right to start a beautiful new life for yourself where those events can no longer have an affect on you. Never give up, and the best start I believe is to seek out a professional who specialises in your area of PTSD, and perhaps there are others who have healed and can share how they did.

My best wishes for you and your journey angel xx