I was recently in a car accident and my symptoms have become worse

[Blondie1989]

I don't know where to start, i feel like I have had so many events to bring me to what I have become I always try an stay positive an over come my negative thoughts but I let them take over.

I just broke down an cry I have overwhelming pacnic feeling. Sometimes as a release I want to do is clean I become shakey an my breathing changes, I feel in control an I block any bad thoughts out by doing this, other times I just want to sit an cry in the shower an feel so numb.

I recently was in a car accident an my symptoms have become worse. Yes I was lucky to walk away with just bruising an I am so grateful to be alive but I am also so angry this has happened to me an why me I wasn't in the wrong.

[Nikkir]

Hi Blondie1989,

and welcome to Beyond Blue, thank you so much for reaching out. It sounds like you have been through alot and that you are struggling to remain positive even though that is how you usually are. I guess when we have been through traumatic events, we don't even recognise sometimes that we have changed until there are definite symptoms. My first thought is to see a GP if not already and make sure you are alright in every way, you can get a referral to talk to someone and work through this trauma and hopefully retrain your thoughts and way of being to be more positive again. I definately understand what you mean about being grateful that you walked away but also having mixed emotions of feeling angry because you didn't deserve it in the first place. You can call us on 1300 22 4636 or chat to us online but I do suggest working with someone more one on one at a deeper level to explore these thoughts and feelings further and integrate them because I am sure many of us would have had the same reaction and in fact I have had someone run into me when I was parked and I was without a car for 2 weeks though not hurt and I was really angry even though I was trying to take the high road, the inconvenience and injustice really annoyed me. The only thing i would say is this, do it for yourself, because anger and resentment and bringing up the past just hurt us, everyone else just moves on. I wish you all the best and I hope that you can get your wonderful and positive nature back despite all that you have been through. Please let us know if there is anything we can do or resources or just a chat online. Nikkir x

[MsPurple]

Hi Blondie and welcome to the BB forums. I think Nikkir advice is really good so I'll try not overlap.

I just want to let you know that mental illness is nothing to be ashamed of. One in 4 will have a mental illness at some point in their live. Accepting help is nothing to be ashamed of and having a mental illness is nothing to be ashamed off. Accepting help for my anxiety was the best thing I did. I now have it under control and can now enjoy life without being constantly cripped by my anxiety. Although I may still have bad anxiety days they are way better then it used to be (on a daily basis it used to be really hard).

Hope this helps. It does get better. There is nothing wrong with you. You can be happy and not feel numb with some help and support