How do I fix my pelvic floor without triggering my trauma?

[Slipperyfish]

Hi

first time posting and I’m super anxious about it. But I’m needing advice and I’m not sure where else to turn

2 years ago yesterday was when I was first sexually assaulted. It was after a date I went on with someone I met from tinder. After it all happened I just did all that I could to get away and I kept my mouth shut. About a month later I was attacked on my way home from work by the same guy, but this time he had his mate with him. Fast forward 2 years and I’m in regular therapy to deal with PTSD. It’s going ok and I feel like I’m kicking goals. My issue now is that my pelvic floor is literally non existent. I have to cross my legs when I sneeze and there is no way I can run without having some form of leakage. I’m working with a physio trying to strengthen it but attempting the exercises causing me so much stress. I end up having vivid flash backs, break out in a sweat and lately I’ve been fainting and then dissociating and loosing track of where I am. I feel like I’m going backward with my PTSD treatment but I need to be doing something to fix my pelvic floor.

Has anyone experienced anything like this? My physio is soooo supportive and knows about my history, but even she is stumped on how to move forward!

Any advice or suggestions anyone can give me would be greatly appreciated! I just want to move forward with life and I’m finding that everything always comes back to the assaults and I never escape! I’m just really tired and I’m struggling to find people to talk to who understand what is happening in my head and who has similar struggles to me.

Please, help me to move forward! Please and thanks

[Cs15]

I'm sorry to hear this.
I have experienced something different but somewhat similar in regard to the pelvic floor. I was sexually abused as a child by first a man and then many years later a women.

I had a boyfriend when I was 14 who found out about this abuse. I lost my virginity to him and he said my vagina was loose due to this abuse.

Fast forward 10 years I've had 2 kids. I've been very insecure about my vagina.

My trick is to do kegals while distracted. Listen to loud music. Think about kegal exersizes as a health need not a sexual thing.
If you flexed your legs to build muscle it's for health. Try think about your pelvic floor as a health issue

[geoff]

Hello Slipperyfish, and thanks for posting your comment.

I'm so sorry about what has happened to you and you have my sympathy and there are a few different sites that you can look at, you may have already, so just copy and paste these in your search browser.

-something to fix my pelvic floor

-strengthen pelvic floor muscles without Kegels

-pelvic floor exercises step by step

-pelvic floor exercises step by step

-pelvic floor muscles female

I hope some of these help you.

Best wishes.

Geoff.

[Slipperyfish]

Thank you for the advice! I am finding that the more I do my exercises my anxiety and fear is becoming less of an issue. I am having really bad flash backs now though and waking up in a panic. But I suppose I just take each day as it comes! But thank you!

[Slipperyfish]

Thank you I will check the sites out and see what google has to say 🙂

[romantic_thi3f]

Hi Slipperyfish,

Thank you for your post. I want to really credit you for all the hard work that you've done so far, especially with your physio and your PTSD treatment. I know that it's not an easy road and yet I can see how persistent you are.

While I know how tough it can be, I know that with your PTSD treatment, things will get easier and your pelvic floor 'will get stronger'.

Here's one resource that you might find helpful: https://www.continence.org.au/resources.php/01tA0000001b1doIAA/live-better-with-urinary-incontinence It's 19 pages but it covers so many things that you can do other than just pelvic floor exercises.

I wonder too if when doing the kegel exercises, you could incorporate it into a whole body exercise- there's a meditation/mindfulness exercise called a 'progressive muscle relaxation', so you start with your toes - tensing and releasing, and continue up the body all the way through the arms, shoulders and face. That way it can feel a little bit more 'holistic' rather than just focused on such a traumatic area.

The last thing that I want to suggest is pads - which I'm sure that you're aware of, but they can give you a bit of extra security. If you are female, you could even look at 'period underwear' which is just standard underwear but with absorbency. They also come in really cool colours and look like normal underwear which I think takes some of the shame and self-consciousness away!

I hope that this helps! It's a bit of a long post but there are lots of resources out there.

RT

[Slipperyfish]

Thank you! I appreciate the support!