C-ptsd and too much

[rose49]

I have long since known I have C-PTSD but I just lost my reason to live. The only thing that got me through every dark time. I'm half way through a course that might have rescued her from where I left her. But, now I feel like I'm losing it on a whole new level. I get anxiety attacks all the time especially with the people I live with and especially with people. I get these fits of screaming and hitting anything I can to make it stop. My head constantly hurts now. I can't do anything that would remind me that I'm living, it's too much. My flash backs are so much worse now I end up in a fetal position harming myself, so it will stop. I don't know what's happening to me.

[Sophie_M]

Hi rose49,

Welcome to the Beyond Blue online forums. We are sorry that it feels like it’s all too much at the moment, but please know that it's so important that you’ve reached out here today. You’ve mentioned that you’ve lost the only thing that has helped you through these difficult times. If you’re comfortable, it would be great to hear more about what has got you through these dark moments so the community can best support you.

As we’re concerned about your well-being, we’d ask if you can please let us know that you have a plan to keep yourself safe. We’d urge you to reach out to our Support Service if you'd like to talk things through with a  professional mental health counsellor immediately (1300 22 4636 or on Webchat 3pm-12am AEST on our website: www.beyondblue.org.au/getsupport). If you feel unable to keep yourself from acting on your thoughts about self-harm, this is an emergency and you need to call 000 (triple zero).

Keep checking in to let us know how you are going when you feel up to it.