This bipolar life

[Kazzl]

Are your moods are like an elevator with no control buttons? Mine are.

Ground floor ... I feel normal, content, just quietly getting on with ordinary, everyday life, loving my family and friends. This is as it should be. And maybe there's nothing wrong with me after all. Live.

Going up, top floor. Oh look! There's a shiny thing! I want to sing! Let's go buy stuff! Let's have a big party and invite the world! What could possibly go wrong! Woooooo hoooooooo! Play.

Going up (a different day) top floor. What do you mean you don't agree with me! I'm right! Why don't you think like me? Keep up! How can you be so illogical? I'll f-ing shred you if you don't do what I want! Rage.

Going down, lower ground floor. Flat, listless, can't be bothered. Can still function but it's a drag. Cope

Going down, basement. I'm never getting out of bed again. I'm useless, worthless. Total idiot, how could I ever imagine I could do anything, nothing ever goes right because I'm wrong. I'm a burden to everyone. Hide.

Welcome to my bipolar world. It's always been my world, but it's only recently I've seen it for what it is. About 15 years ago I was diagnosed with clinical depression during one of my 'basement' times. I had a lot of lower ground floor times too, on and off, and I kept out of the basement (so I thought) with alcohol. Until that took me into the blackest ever basement with only one obvious way out. Having survived doing something very dangerous I realised I had to stop drinking or I really would die.

I never took much notice of the playful times or the anger, that was just me, I was fun sometimes, and sometimes I was a devastating bitch. Ha! Deal with it people!

Well, yes, but in time the elevator started going up and down too quickly and, as I became more aware and more knowledgeable about mental health I realised this wasn't good. Doctor. Diagnosis. Bipolar 2. Lithium.

So, I've started this thread in the hope that other bipolar folks will join me, to share experiences and strategies. In my 'beginners' understanding, we are different from other fellow travellers of the back dog. While we experience depression as many others on this site do, the hypomanic or manic ups and, for some the rapid cycling that can happen, are experiences unto themselves.

I want to learn more, and I want to share with others. I hope my fellow elevators will join me here.
BTW, it's a ground floor day in my head today! Yay!

Love

Kaz

[quirkywords]

Hello everyone

I am just wondering if people eat more when they are high or low.

Loula do you clean up after baking when manic. I was banned from baking at home as the kitchen looked like a ship wreck and usually I did not finish so there was no food made!! I was a teenager then.

Velvet what sort of cake do you like?

Quirky

[velvetfaerie]

My appetites always all over the place. There really isn't a set pattern.

I like all the cakes. ALL ! Chocolate is always a winner. Chocolate. Mud. Cake.

Cheesecakes. Vanilla sponge cakes. Madeira cakes.

**drools**

OK....... so it seems man things mother and I are going to the theatre next month. **FEAR** She asked me to go to a show with her. Must. Be. On. Best. Behaviour.

[quirkywords]

Velvet

what show will you see- that sounds exciting.

I am hungry mud cake yum.

Quirky

[velvetfaerie]

Mrs Browns Boys.

She has loads of mates too, but apparently its not their thing. I have met her once before for an hour. LOL

Out. With the theoretical but not legal mother in law.

😕

[Loula]

I describe my eating habits the same as bear. I will go for days eating then eat barley nothing.

Cleaning? What is that you are talking off? I was a teen too and left it for mum because after I finished making the cakes I was onto the next activity.

Quriky what cake you like?

Velvet are we seeing someone? Just be yourself with the mother that's all I can advice.

[Airies]

Doing a lot of comfort eating at the moment. Eat whether high or low. Yo yo dieting doesn't help. I'd love to get back into consistent excercise but more importantly consistent healthy eating. So sad to hear of the passing of the lead singer of the Cranberries, a sufferer of bipolar. Love chocolate, vanilla slices, a good sponge cake... I love food.. That's my problem, currently not so flash,

cheers

[velvetfaerie]

Can only be myself..... I don’t act unless paid

lol

[Loula]

Glad to hear it Velvetfaerie.

I woke up shocked to the news she passed away. Love that band! I had zero clue she had Bipolar airies. Hopefully that was not a reason or one of the reasons into her tragic death.

[Tasa83]

SAD affects me in that different weather can change my mood eg down in winter, manic in summer. It can affect BiPolarians but sometimes people are affected without BP.

[quirkywords]

Hello everyone,

Tasa, That is interesting about SAD. I can be high or low no matter what the weather.

Airies, I do comfort eating. Ye sit is sad when a great singer dies so young.

Loula, I like Mangoes and all stone fruit.

Velvet, Mrs Brown Boys- I have never watched it on TV. I saw Muriel's wedding the musical and it wa wonderful.

Quirky