relationship breakup

[awrinkle_in_time]

Hi , i was in a relationship the first after a divorce of a 20 year marriage , i didn't think i would find love again , i meet this lady through some good friends and we started slow seeing each other on weekends , we lived 2 hrs apart .. we found comfort in each other and the time we spent together was the best time i have ever spent with a women , i could watch the grass grow for ever in her company . as time went on the baggage in both our lives came out and instead of dealing with it we just broke up .. she was scared and so was i .. the going our own ways happened so suddenly and i couldn't believe it happened ...approx 10months ago ... we had little contact and got on with our lives ..i whole time feeling very sad i felt a massive loss .. honestly thought we wold spend our lives together .. i speak of the good times now but there were times that her baggage came out and with out an open communication at these times it would be impossible to have a lasting relationship ...no such communication was possible ... and i know us being apart is better ..but i am still so in love with her ...i messaged her a few days ago and showed her pictures of my apartment which i have renovated ..the finished product ..she didn't reply ..i messaged my feelings and she replied with i think you should move on like i have ..i asked her if she was seeing anyone and she said yes ...i had to get myself home and i vomited many times and just put myself to bed ..i am reliving the weekends i said with her and seeing another guy in her life exactly like i was ...i try to reflect to the times that help me understand that it wouldn't have worked between us but my heart is so full of love for her .. its painful and i can't stop crying

[awrinkle_in_time]

Yes i know , i hope the cry helped .. the walk will be good i hope your dramas give you a light day ..i feel a little better but she is three in my mind ...i wish i could turn it off

[awrinkle_in_time]

im not a relegios person but i do believe in good stuff .. you know ..

[monkey_magic]

In my experience they come and go in the mind. My ex from years ago still enters my head. I don't want him in there. Its a battle & you're a conqueror.

[monkey_magic]

I'm not religious either & I also believe in good stuff, a higher ground perhaps.

[awrinkle_in_time]

Yes your right .. she just feels so present ..anyway I'm keeping busy ..and i will conquor it , it all wouldn't have worked ..i know that ..thanks for being hear

[monkey_magic]

Unfinished business perhaps? Will you still be friends? I stayed friends with my exes. Not everyday friendship but we stay in contact, sometimes it needs time. I understand that, them feeling present. Does she need you? It's all your choice now what to do. What do u think ull do??

Just remember the mind is powerful. It can make them seem more important than what they really are.

I don't think you should feel sorry for yourself, other things will come your way.

[awrinkle_in_time]

We wont be friends , i have deleted her contacts ..and I'm sure time will allow it to drift away .. I need to put other stuff in my life now ...I don't want to feel sorry for myself ..i think sometimes i do ..I just keep saying that it wouldn't have worked out..i hope she finds what she's looking for .. and thats it really ..

[awrinkle_in_time]

Thanks for listening , if you ever want to down load your dramas feel free .. Ill be hear for you ..Enjoy your walk

[monkey_magic]

Thanks simon,

I have a thread "should I suck it up"in the "depression"section, if u dare to go there lol, explains what I'm currently thinking about/ going through.

[awrinkle_in_time]

ok ill have a read , i went out to visit a mate and have come home I'm not good have been crying and have lost it .. its a bitch this feeling