Alone..Depressed..Sad..

[Ggrand]

Hi..I'm new here..just need to put my feeling down..no one to talk to makes depression and anxiety so hard...the last 4 days I have either been in bed crying or on the lounge crying..I can't seem to get out of this...I am becoming a prisioner in my own home as its getting progressively difficult to go out.. I have to go out Tuesdays so I do everthing on that day but it's like I'm holding my breathe all day until I get back to the safety of my home then I can let go and that starts the cycle again of spending the next 6 days at home either in bed or on the lounge sad and depressed...I really feel like just giving up.. My husband passed away 4 years on This coming Thursday. My children live 6 hours drive away and have small children so I don't see them that much.Bad mum and grandmum I am on there last visit i was pleased to see them but I just wanted them to go home. I feel so aweful and numb atm..

[demonblaster]

Hello gorgeous Grandy love 👩‍❤️‍👩

Dear lady I hope you're feeling even just a little brighter today darling friend.
It's a major deal to go through isn't it.

When I hear the birdies singing Grandy I imagine being at your place and hearing them. I heard the most beautiful sound today. There wasn't many others around at the time. Hard to explain it kinda had maybe 3 different sounds.

I hope you've been getting plenty of sleep precious soul as we know it's nourishing for physical as well as mentally.

If you'd like to take my hand 🤝 beautiful love I thought we could go for a walk in the garden.
Aren't Dahlias magnificent. I really love that deep rich Red it's so powerful in it's proud glory

Oh the African Violets have such an intense beauty in their colour don't they. How gorgeous there's a Petunia the same colour and next to it a vibrant Yellow one. Striking contrast

The White Roses are a treat aren't they. They radiate an untouched pure freshness

Ohhh look at the Peacock over there Grandy with it's magnificent tail on display.
The depth of Blue and shine in the Green it's just spectacular isn't it.

Oh that's what I love... hanging vines. See some are wrapped around the trunks. Some have beautiful Mauve flowers, others have tinsy wee bell shaped soft Blue ones and if you look closely at that one see the little tiny Yellow darlings with a Red centre

Close by a magpie sings it's beautiful peaceful song. Another joins in.

A leaf so gently floating down in no hurry what so ever twirling at times while it silently finds it's way through the cool refreshing air to it's resting place on the ground.

A chorus of birds join in with the Magpies.

Sun light streams between the magnificent trees standing tall and proud in their mighty ageless years of growth.

The sound of soft running water gliding over pebbles takes us to another level of peace.

A gentle tingle of energy surges through our bodies while we emerse ourselves totally relaxed in this magical creek of wonder

An Eagle soars through the air with with an art of graceful perfection

To our surprise we spot White Lillies lounging so gracefully on their floating pads. To our pleasant astonishment they wink and smile at us whispering we're going to be ok.

We are beautiful Grandy.
You're deeply loved
Never alone
👩‍❤️‍👩💜🤝🕊

[Ggrand]

Hello Deebi👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩, Paws, Hanna and everyone...🤗..

Just popping in to say thank you very much for your kindness and care...and to let you know that I’m okay....

I appreciate your care so much..

I cancelled Thursday appointment with VS...VS rang my supporter to reappoint...Supporter msged me today..with new date 22 Oct...I am not wanting to see her right now..her continued breaking of her visits on Friday’s..Is not doing my mh any good...

I have been fighting my thoughts since last Tuesday....If I do/say something I need to at work...which I know is the right thing to do...2 girls at work will be asked to leave...they done wrong by me, wrong by the charity shop...

If I keep quiet, then no one gets hurt/dismissed etc...except my feelings and self worth of being scared to do so...ha..still no courage even to say what’s right...

I don’t want to feel guilty if these 2 get dismissed, I also don’t want to feel guilty because I know what I should do but can’t....It’s about 2 large donations made to the store over the past few weeks....

If I speak up and they are not dismissed, just reprimanded...how can I then go every Tuesday and be comfortable working with them?....

It never rains with me..It always a storm...So right now I am stuck in my head and I am confused...

Anyway...I’m okay...just wanted to let you that I am...

Much love to you bbff...Bear hugs..💜🐻🤗..

Love and hugs to Paws, Hanna and everyone..

👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩Grandy...

[monkey_magic]

Oh Grandy,

You have such a soft heart and a sharp intellect.

I think it all depends on if u can live with not speaking up, whichever makes you feel better.

I don't like dobbing but if it's a really big thing I might open my mouth.

Good luck with whatever you decide to do.

🍀

[demonblaster]

Hey darlin Grandy 👩‍❤️‍👩 and everyone hi ☺

Really good hearing from you thanks hun. I know it's so hard atm and you have other stress eating at you poor love.

It's a very hard one you're up against I feel sorry Grandy it's quite a dilemma.
I was thinking do you think a decision would be better made when you're not in such hard headspace. I know it's at you and making it so much harder dear love it might be easier and an amswer may come to you clearer later.

Sweetyheart I feel that because they did wrong by you and they've by the sounds done the wrong thing fullstop.
You have every right to stand up for yourself.
If they got dismissed that's because of their actions.

The hard part is as you're aware they may not get dismissed.

Thing is I don't see why you should have to have this weight on your shoulders and certainly not them doing wrong by you.

You poor love. I stand by you with whatever choice you make 🤗🤝

Geez what is it with her constantly getting out of the walks. Poor form.
Talking of her though you don't want to see her yet I know.
Wondering whether you feel up to talking to her about the work issue.

You're doing well holding Grandy I know this is so hard let alone other rot going on.
Always with you and listening dear love.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Always thoughts 🗯 love and care.

👩‍❤️‍👩🔥🤗👀🕊😚🤝💜

[Ggrand]

Hello Magic, Deebi👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩....and all..

Thank you for your caring posts..

I will let you know what happened..if that’s okay..

I took in 2 large donations a few weeks ago..A big box of antique ornaments and antique dolls..I gave them to the shop on the promise that the antique ornaments won’t be sent..the dolls the boss didn’t know about..anyway the next week, all the dolls were gone..over 50 of them..some are worth $200+ dollars one was very rare and could have brought vinnies a good sale...Most of the bigger more expensive antique ornaments were gone also....

I ask my co ordinator where the dolls were..she said that the girl that works with her took them home with her permission...I’m guessing the larger more expensive ornaments as well....I asked her why..she said she will bring them back later on...the way she said that I could tell she’s lying...The girl that took them home does antique stalls around this area at different markets....I think she will sell them and split the sale money with my co ordinator..This is wrong...and so not fair...

In my eyes this is stealing...How many other donations brought in by people with trust that vinnies will re sell and instead has been taken home and possibly re sold at a market...

I know the right thing to do...yet I can’t do it..I would haven the dolls away to children myself had I known this...Or am I wrong...I gave them to vinnies and I shouldn’t care about what happens to them..because they are no longer mine?..

I learnt to trust these people..that trust has gone now..My head is telling me to talk to the boss about it all...but my heart is telling me to quit working their and say nothing...How could people do this..especially in a charity shop which is their to help the needy...

Its really gotten to me..and thoughts won’t stop hounding me..I am really struggling with my thoughts...and me right now..

👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩Grandy..

[Hanna3]

Hi Grandy (hi Deebi, Paws!, Magic)

Grandy dear lady that is a difficult situation. If the supervisor says she gave permission no matter what you say it won't matter. It will also be uncomfortable for you to continue there is the women stay on. People can be greedy and horrible. It's entirely up to you but I would do nothing - the person who took them and sells them knows what she is doing is wrong, and all you can do is remember you are better than her and them - you did the right thing giving them to Vinnies to sell. Pat yourself on the back for being an honest, caring person.

I suspect many things I've given to Op Shops have been taken by women there - a lovely ornament of my mother's would have been worth money and I know someone in the Vinnies where I handed it in (in coastal town) must have taken it... but I figure I have no control over what happens to stuff once I hand it in to the store..

So dear lady just remember you are the decent one in all this, hold your head high, I wouldn't say anything myself, some things you just have to live with... I think people like that get their just desserts somehow.. but even if they don't, YOU know you are better than that, and WE know here, and sending you biggest hugs for being so honest and kind and thoughtful and at the moment, you are hurt. I think you're wonderful!

Hugs oxoxoxo

[Hanna3]

Grandy dear - I wrote my first post in a bit of a rush, excuse the typos etc... you gave the dolls etc in good faith, some people only think about making money for themselves.. it would have been lovely to give the dolls away to children but hopefully they will find good homes and people who enjoy them... you did the right thing, you behaved the right way, that's the main thing! I think all we can do in this world is do the best we can to do what we think is right and kind... the world is a better place for having kind people like you and Deebi and Paws and all the other lovely people here in it..

Sending loveliest wishes across to you in your little town from little Sam and me here in B town..

Are you around over the long weekend Grandy? I will be alone, other people all seem to have family visiting... it will be nice if you are around to chat over the long weekend...

I hope you feel better soon... fluffiest hugs oxoxooo

[demonblaster]

Dear Grandy 👩‍❤️‍👩 hi Hannah and all ☺

Thanks I'm glad you opened up darlin.
It certainly would be upsetting and it was hard for you to do in the first place. You've had them a long time.
They have done the wrong thing there!

Good on you asking where they were.
You were so kind giving them to them to sell and finding that out would have been hard.

I think the supervisor being involved will be making it a lot harder to get anywhere if you decide to talk to the boss although you surely do have good reason to be very slacked off and let down.
People can be completely heartless and selfish!

Darlin I think if you're feeling that you want to leave do so and if you decided to talk to the boss you could as well.
These were precious to you.

Grandy please don't let beasty get the better of you. You're stronger than [IT]⚘ no matter what's thrown at you, you always come through.

Last post what I was meaning was maybe you could ring the support lady not meaning to see her I know you don't want to yet.

I feel for you Grandy love 🤗👩‍❤️‍👩💜 this is very hard. I know it's gnawing at you.

Always with you beautiful darlingheart
Love to you with 🗯 always and concern.

PubAok lysvm yadimh bbff.
Remember the numbers if you need them sweety.
Don't like it when you're hurting so much 🤗

👩‍❤️‍👩💜🤝🔥🐧

[Ggrand]

Hello Deebi👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩, Hanna and everyone...

I understand what you’re saying, but I can’t accept that..The co ordinator is just a worker like me..she is no one special in the shop...neither is her friend she gave them to...

They stole from the charity shop for their own profits on the things they took...They lied to me as well..

I donated them to the shop, not to those 2...

My thoughts are really downing me...Why can’t I just go in and tell my boss...tell him that they stole from the shop...why do I worry about those 2 getting angry and upset with me... When I know they did wrong..I feel small right now, because of my stupid self not being able to voice my thoughts...

I don’t know what to say without being mean to me for my stupidity and cowardness in not doing the right thing here..

Yes Deebi..it’s eating at me constantly...It’s just so wrong..and I can’t right that wrong..because like a young child I am just to scared to speak up...always have been and always will be....

Love to you Deebi..💜👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩..🐻🤗..and thank you for saying you will support me no matter which way I go..

Love, hugs and care Hanna and everyone...💜🤗🦋.

👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩Grandy...

[monkey_magic]

Hi Grandy,

I would be hurt and angry as well.

I would personally muster up the strength to tell the boss and if the boss didn't return the dolls I would take it further. That's just me though.

Under no circumstances should they steal your belongings. They didn't even have the decency to tell U. They took it right from under your nose. That wasn't your intension when handing the dolls over. You have every right to be mad.

But please don't berate yourself. If you can't speak up you could always write a letter to the boss and explain that U will take it further if your things aren't returned.

It's stealing and not acceptable.