Their 1st birthday since passing...

[ABC01]

Dear All,

Tomorrow will be the first birthday of theirs, since they passed.

I am terrified. 

What do I do?

They will never get to age up tomorrow. They won't be celebrated happily, with joy and jubilation. No presents. No birthday dinner. I just can't believe that won't happen.

I have organized lighting the four candles of grief for them. But that is all. Lighting a candle can represent remembrance, honor and respect. And I booked an appointment in with my psychologist because I don't know what to do with myself.

Thank-you for listening. I sometimes feel the world has forgotten him and I want him to be remembered.

ABC01

[BlueLily]

Hi ABC01,

My sincere condolences for the loss of your loved one...

Yes, your loved one will not be able to celebrate his birthday, but you are lighting candles to celebrate for him, which is a very beautiful thing to do. By celebrating his birthday joyously, you are keeping his memory alive, honouring the life he had. 

I once went to a funeral where everybody was wearing colourful outfits, which was requested by the uncle passed away. Then everybody gathered and had beer, because that was uncle's favourite way to socialise. Nobody shed a tear but spoke about all the great things he had done and remembered his beautiful memories. That day I realised that was the the most heart warming celebration of life.

You have uplifted so many souls in this forum. I hope my few words are able to uplift your spirit on this significant occasion...

[ABC01]

Thank you Blue Lily.

What a beautiful handle name. It is helpful to have people hear me and empathise with me on these most important days.

I did light the candles and made sure they weren’t blown out before they ran there course. To me that was significant. Alongside some flowers a loved one brought me and a photograph of the two of us hugging. It was simple but looked very beautiful.

 I was numb by the end of the day. And my sleep wasn’t good that night. The next day I stressed I hadn’t done enough. But I am resolved now that I did. 

Thank you for your last comment too. I have been trying to find purpose in my life and kindness is a good one.

Grateful,

ABC01