Surrendered puppy

[Frya]

My sister has a dog and I thought i would get a puppy so they can be friends. Her dog is reactive to other dogs so i thought it would be good socialising. Also i wanted a puppy for a long time. I realised on the first day i had this feeling of regret but pushed thru for my family. But it was affecting my mental health which already wasnt good. Puppies are no joke. My family werent able to help as much as i thought cos they had work&school so it was just me and the puppy alone everyday, setting boundaries, training, enforced naps, etc. I was burnt out, not eating and drinking in the afternoon and started to feel suicidal - which is why I surrendered her 3 months ago only after 10 days of having her. This is after researching that puppies are great at adapting to change and i thought i would rehome earlier than later for her benefit. She was put in foster care straight away from the shelter & quickly found a home with a family with kids. (Had to email shelter to get an update. Im unable to get updates from new family so im just trusting strangers which is smthing ive had to learn from this) I just feel so much guilt for getting my familys hopes up. They wanted her too but werent willing to change their schedules to help. Which is why i also feel let down by them, just an unfortunate situation. Of course no one in the family wants to talk abt it (i tried but theyre very short with their responses) so ive been stuck in my own head for 3 months. It seems like theyve moved on. I miss that puppy and i know logically i did the right thing and i dont regret it but ive just been sad this whole time. Honestly ive progressed so much since then but some days are harder & its constantly on my mind which is draining

[Frya]

Also i just want to say the feeling of being suicidal i would NEVER act out, i should have clarified that. Thats why i rehomed the day after and im doing a lot better now. Im just dealing with guilt and feeling like i failed

[Summer Rose]

Hi Frya

I’m sorry to learn about your challenging experience with your puppy. I’m sure you did the best you could and I know how hard it is because I’ve raised a few puppies myself.
While I know it was a very difficult decision to re-home the puppy, please always remember that you did the right thing.

It’s okay to feel sad about not having the puppy, but in my opinion it’s unhelpful and unnecessary to feel like you are a failure. The way I see it, you handled the situation really well.

You demonstrated the ability to make a sound, tough decision—and that kind of judgment is a very good thing. 
You acted with intelligence and a kind heart, as you conducted research and acted quickly in the puppy’s best interests.

You showed you have the insight to know when your mental health is suffering and the courage to act. There was nothing to be gained by letting yourself fall unwell.
There are many people who would not have acted so responsibly in the same situation.
You took a leap of faith to try something new and learned that it wasn’t for you. That’s okay. That’s how we all learn.

Kind thoughts to you 

[Frya]

Thank you. It means a lot, i started crying a bit haha

[audiology]

Just wanted to chyme in with my 2c and share a bit of empathy. My little puppy I only got barely a year ago and he was an asbolute nightmare to train - and cos he's a stubborn little dahcshund there's still plenty of training that needs to be done with him. Don't feel too bad - you will get a puppy when you're ready. I didn't get my first pet until I was 38 years old! 

[Frya]

Thank you. Im happy for u and your pup! I hope youre doing alright. Puppies are a challenge. Maybe i'd get a cat in the far future. But i dont think i'd be able to without being reminded of the puppy. Ah well live and learn