Hi JN, my deepest sympathy to you and your family.
Death for us doesnt make sense does it? To be taken away forever. So how do we cope. Well, everyone has a different way but here is some ideas.
Humans usually have a gravesite where they visit to grieve and remember. This was always the purpose. No matter the race humans use symbols of grandeur to house their loved one. Even pyramids!.
But for some no stone of remembrance is necessary. In my case for my loved ones I dont have a need to visit graves at all. That's me. So how do I cope? Some draw, some paint, some write them a note, some set aside a time every day to think about them so it doesnt effect their work or other activities. Some, sadly cant do any of that and pour out their emotions uncontrollably at anytime.
Below there is a poem I wrote for my beautiful dad that passed in 1992 aged 64. I'm now 58. It is an example of therapy/comfort during times of grief. Hope you see its worth and maybe you can write a few words for your brother. You sound like a wonderful sister.
DADS PRINT
Dad knew I'd always try to follow
where ever he went in his footprints
through his pride and boyish whim
I always tried to follow him
And on Sundays a few hours spare
I be his shadow for the day to care
Boy behind his dad so tall
But he didnt mind- didnt mind at all
Then as life cut so short
I wish to follow as my last resort
No wonder he used a broom to sweep
To hide my footstep stencilled feet
But now and then I see a print
where he's been in the misty tint
Like a ghostly outline of a sole
I place my foot inside the hole
Sadness followed in my inept
it's just something I must accept
But I be eager the day my feet will greet
my father's footstep stencilled feet....
WK
