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losing dad
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Hi Cobber
I'm so sorry to hear of the loss of your Dad. I can fully relate to this loss and you are just in the very early stages of the loss ... you'll have many many emotions to encounter.
It did sound like an unpleasant aftermath and unfortunate for what happened.
How are things at the moment with your son and daughter? And your best friend from school ... are things ok or are they really damaged?
By you coming to this site it does indicate to me that you are wanting to create change and wanting to start to move forward in a bit more of a positive fashion??
Would you feel the next step to change might be to go and see your GP to discuss some of these issues? But I think you can only do this, if you really want this to change.
I'll send this off now, but to also say that your other post "heartbreak", I think it was called, was one very well worded and powerful message.
And please write back again if you feel ok to do so.
Kind regards
Neil
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Hi Cobber
In your first post here you didn't give a lot of detail, but I read a reply that you posted on another thread, which said that you were the sole care giver to your Dad over the past 4 or so months. That would have been an enormous thing to deal with ... even though he's your Dad and he loved you so much and vice versa, when they're being eaten away on the inside, it would have been really tough.
I'm guessing that your children must be reasonably grown up now, as you are going to head off by yourself?
Have you told your son yet, of your intentions? He must be happy for you that you're taking this step? And as you say, once you get settled there, you can seek out appropriate professional help ... and this will go a long way to setting you on a more positive path and future.
Cobber, I hope you can stay in touch with us via this site ... you've got so much still to deal with on a personal basis, with the grief process.
My thoughts are with you ...
Kind regards
Neil
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Hi Cobber
Thank you for posting again. You said some things in your post that really ring true for me as well. Although you said you're terrified of your son and his wife; I have a brother who since my Dad passed away some six years ago, we haven't spoken and you know, I feel so much better for it. I don't know he turned out that way, but he turned into a nasty piece of work and his wife is like poison. I'm sorry to hear though that you find your son and his wife to be that way. It's a weird old world we live in, isn't it. Especially for say a mum ... you do everything you think you can and do the right things by your children and then something happens and they're nasty to you. I hope you're ok.
Your relationship with your mum sounds a little like mine also. I love her to bits, but we can only do things in small stints. But yeah, my love for her is incredibly strong and she's battling bone cancer at the moment and has been for around 4-5 years.
It's funny, cause I've never done FaceBook and don't think I ever will, but I find this site to be kind of therapeutic ... I get into it, and reply to other people and try my best to advise or assist with my experience that I've had with this horrible disease and I kind of lose myself. I know it's actually not helping me because I'm really just pushing my problems back a little, but oh well. What can you do?
I do hope you continue to stay here and I hope you can venture to some of the other threads in the forum ... as I think you'd have some wonderful experience that you could share to other sufferers.
Kind regards
Neil
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sorry to hear about your dad.i have fear of losing dad i am a only child
but i worry about me having to speak at hes funeral i dont have anyone else to speak for me is it comon for the celebrant to speak on my behalf and say nothing