Would really appreciate peoples thoughts on a housing situation !

[randomxx]

Hi to all.

lt's an unbelievable time in life to find myself stuck in this position, just don't know how to look at it, or what to do about with it, if l can anything at all. 

Problem is, at almost 60, yeah l've mixed up details in other threads just a bit concerned some l know may also be here and haven't wanted any connection here that l might know, butttt, yep.

Thing is l didn't get anything out of my last house, the people l went into the property with as it was a big place, went broke.

Well , sort of lucky although maybe a curse , not sure anymore but l do still have a 1ac country property, 18yrs now, from back when l was married.

l can't work anymore for mh reasons but if l took care l can survive until l can get the pension- living at the 1ac place- it only has a small over nighter atm but l could extend and it'd come up quite nice .

Problem is, it's in a ting town, 30mins to the main town which is a really nice place and there's also a couple of tiny ones in between before that main buttttt, out where this place is, is tiny and out on it's own .

l always planned selling it about now but problems are now that for 1, even if it did sell, it's just a cheap little country block it'd only be a good deposit on something closer in- but circumstances now that'd mean a new mortgage and l'd have to keep working too, don't think l could stomach either of those especially the stress in trying to make it happen.

2nd thing highly possible it doesn't even sell anyway.

l know l'm lucky to at least have it and all , with the housing crisis and so many in worser positions , l just never dreamed l'd be living on it though and honestly, just don't know but it looks like l might be forced to.

l grew up in the city and have lived in some of the nicest places in the country but to have to settle on this place out there now- look the property itself is a really cute block and in a nice little back street- if l could put it on a truck to somewhere else it'd be really nice - but this town.

rx

[randomxx]

Just read back here.

lt's all rght there in the first few posts , from you er and from Tony and from myself too deep down.

You both pretty well summed it up right there and amongst all this since, deep down that's the way l've been feeling too.

You talked about your town there and Tony about past situations similar for himself too but both are pretty well my situation here and echoing exactly what l've been struggling with about staying here.

Thinking do the small work on the place which should get it sold, and move on !

Stop fighting myself on this , my gut. 

As Tony mentioned , that option 3, pretty well what you thought too er and pretty well what l've felt deep down as well right through to if l'm honest with myself.

Been twisting myself into knots just trying to fit square pegs into round holes though since that's been the problem.

rx

[Eagle Ray]

Hi rx,

I can really hear how you are reflecting and moving between different thoughts and states of mind about the property. 

If you go with option 3, I agree with Tony that looking for a town of a decent size is a good idea. He mentions 3000-5000 people. I think 3000 and above is a good idea. My town is smaller and that really has its limitations. Even things like having events that come to town or community activities - it is very limited where I am. Many days I can imagine a tumbleweed blowing down the main street, except during high tourist season when it changes. Sunday afternoon it is dead as a doornail here. Everything is closed, except the pub and a couple of other places "might" be open for meals.

So, anyway, I guess you do want to think long term and how you might feel in say 10 years time. Having a unit or house in a larger town would likely feel less isolating than being on a property that is sort of on the edge of a much smaller town. It's different when you are in a family situation, but on your own I imagine you want to feel some connection with others more and like those connections are accessible. I wish I had moved to the larger town half an hour drive from me. It is much bigger than here and there is so much more happening there. I really thought I was doing myself a favour moving to the more remote place which is picturesque and peaceful, yet it's been so socially isolating.

Anyway, it's great if you feel a little clearer. Continuing to write out how you feel probably has been helping you just try to sort through it all. I understand decision making is so hard. I am trying to make a decision about another issue in my life at present, and it is horrendous 🙈 I just want to go and lie under a tree in nature and forget it all.

Take good care rx and hope you are doing ok with everything and that things are perhaps feeling a little clearer. Big hugs to you!

[randomxx]

Hiya er , hope your ok. 

And thx as always for everything , always appreciated even if just a chat.

Actually, l think l told my list back there back to front. The pros were 4things but big ones. The cons however, also big other things though was prettyyyy long,about 16 against l think. like happiness for example, lack of.

But anyway, l feel big relief lately now bc trying to squeeze myself into this situation here was really really worrying me all through.

So anyway, still feeling the same and l wanna get the jobs done, few wks,  and then maybe take off for a bit 1st of all- get outa here and clear my poor head.

lf it does sell it still leaves worries finding something in a better spot, paying for it buttttt,  when l do l'll be pretty relieved on that one let me tell ya, it's gonna take a bit butttt, l don't wanna live like this here,

But yeah fully agree er, at least 3k, preferably much bigger like my main up here for me.  unless we're just naturally a small town person which neither of us are, l mean 3-5k better for sure but personally yeah l'd if l have a choice yeah, l'd like a lot more. Well, unless the area was alternative with some good stuff happening.

Or even something up closer to my main here would be great buttt, will have to cross that bridge later though if l can sell this one.

But er , man, l'm so sorry about things and that decision at your end right now, really. l don't normally have any trouble with them myself but this one here for me, it's been a biggie especially being alone and l'll still worry like hell l'm making the right one.

For you atm , you may have been already but is there anyone you trust to run it by, talk it over, or even anyone round BB here where it might be along their line and that you'd feel comfortable with ?

l have done that myself on this one , right here ofc but with d and brother and stuff too. Sort of helped, well here has def' for sure.

l worry for you if it is alone atm and l'd really like you talk to someone if you'd be ok with that, right person. But eh, just thoughts, you know you much better than l.

And thku so much for the hugs to , very appreciated right now and returned to u er times lots ok. Pls take care of you .

rx .  oo

[randomxx]

That's ironic.

The 70yr old l told about, just emailed me tonight bc we kinda became mates when he came out here.

Well, turns out he found some nice all totally flat block that he felt he'd manage ok, started organizing and put money down on the house he was gonna build as well, plus the land. Now, he's been told he better move to Adelaide and fast , he;s now got some bad health thing apparently and their climate will help it.

All in a matter of a few mths and now he's not sure how much of his money which was everything he had, he's gonna get back to even make the move.

Poor bugger.

[Eagle Ray]

Hi rx,

Yeah, I'm all for at least 3000 and would be happier even with a lot more than that too. I've really learned from being in this town that population matters. You get more diversity and more chance of meeting people like yourself. And there is just simply more on in terms of events, activities, groups etc. I really miss the relative anonymity of the city now, like going to a cafe and you don't know anyone and you can just quietly do your own thing. Like you can work on something in the cafe and just sort of be there. But equally there are options to connect and be around others too. Having said that, a favourite cafe of mine in Perth was actually a place I used to see others I know a fair bit, so I'd get to have chats and catch ups, but there were plenty of days too I remember just going there and reading and working on stuff on my iPad. There's that nice feeling of a diversity of people being around you but you have your own little space there. I only really go to the bakery in my town now and very occasionally one of the cafes, but I can't say I enjoy it in the way I did in the city or when visiting a much larger town.

I hope you feel a bit of relief about the decision anyway if it is becoming a bit clearer. Fortunately for me today I made my decision about my other life issue, which was about completing a course of study or not. I have decided against it and it feels right. I just had to go through the pains of making the decision, but now I'm on the other side it really does feel better. I did talk to some people actually, including my psychologist and Lifeline a couple of times. They didn't push me in any direction but just held space for me as I talked things through. That definitely helped and then today it fell into place for me.

And now I've just read your last post. Yes, poor guy, having the health issue and having to rethink everything and relocate to Adelaide unexpectedly. It really reflects how life is unpredictable. I guess as we age there is a bit of an increase in potential health issues. I was naïve about what I thought I could manage with this place and my health situation had other ideas. I remember seeing a unit in another country town that just had a small paved courtyard where you could put a few pot plants. I thought that was too limiting at the time and that I would prefer more of a garden, but now that simplicity is so appealing. Anyway, I'm so sorry for your friend. I do hope he can work things out financially. I am wondering if there are any ways for him to get financial help/support in that situation, or if he has any family who can help him out?

You take care too rx and I really hope you are doing ok and feeling a bit better about things. Hugs to you!

[randomxx]

Morning er.

That is great you've worked it out but yeah committing to things like that or not wrong time right time yes no can also be big stuff can't they. Especially how much we can handle mentally l find bc sometimes overload is just plain bad for us.

l don't know him v well, not at all really , so l'll leave it there l think best tbh but yeah hope he gets sorted, such big shyt in he's position and now health stuff, poor bugger.

Ha, yeah, enonymity ha, tell me about it. Growing in cities exactly , man l struggle with that in these small areas. The post office here kills me, you have to go in to get mail and parcels, effg hate it. Half the towns often in there to and the stupid b can never find your stuff half the time you have to go back another day bc you know it's there she's just missed it and it's like oh, yeah, there it is- bloody hell.

But it took me yrs in my old town to get use to going out anywhere there, felt like putting on a disguise, it's stupid but l dunno. When your use to the city , this small town stuffs a whole nother animal isn't it. l never did go sit somewhere for a coffee there.

l'd be thinking the garden at yours might be a good thing , good for ya, but then does depend l know. Wouldn't be worried about looking after this place in that way love being out on it doing stuff so nice .

Actually l'm swaying again , damn it.

Sometimes it's just so damn nice being here and you do sort of get use to the locals just coming going peacefully about their lives - when so much of the worlds going so mad these daYs. Really has that outpost own world feel round here, sometimes it's really nice, damn it.

But then financially to, l'd be sooooo set for life just staying put. Not only is the thought just making me sick of finding and paying for something else but all the work and nowhereness of trying again, over, mannnn. it's all making me sick.

That's why l desperately need a break away later first, a step back, hopefully clear the head. ldbloodyknow.

They say keep emotions out of decisions , easier said than done.

rx 

[randomxx]

Hmm. Bloody hell is all l can say.

Been really nice here this last wk or so, few things. Seeing new people round the town too which makes all the difference. Another thing, nothing l can say except that l am Dyslexic so often mix up writing, reading but that list, l had it right the 1st time here. lost it and l only just found it last night but it's actually vise versa , about 12 for, 4 against, bloody hell but encase l change my mind that was a relief anyway actually in a way.

But anyway yeah , few things. 1st of all some of the new blocks that have come up around town have sold, means new people and l am seeing a few.

Yaknow, l like that stuff l'm about the people in an area, one reason l love central vic, all sorts around over there. At any rate even if l don't know them l just like a mix so yeah, there is at least some new things happening around the place.

Scanning RE property lightly last few wks and seeing the insane prices, being one of the v few still cheap pockets around over here, makes sense it's bringing new people, that's how it works as everywhere else has double just in the last few yrs, it's madness.

Anywayyyy, also got a call from gf ex yesterday, probably shouldn't have answered , buttttt,  l did.  Says l'm crazy, she's been out to cabin we use to come over a bit , she really liked it here. Anyway say your mad, it's free living forever, you could just extend the cabin cash, your set. Hmmm, l know, that's where the struggle is with it. And the thought of starting over somewhere new is sickening.

Soooo, ldk. Jezuz. Anyway, as you can see, nothing but a yo yo here atm but think l'll take a break and get away for a few wks soon, step back for a bit.

[randomxx]

All over the damn place.

No sooner decide one way then flip. Never been in this situation l'm usually a snap decision type. But lately 1st it was gf ex all that in the air 18mths and every which way, now this !

Wish my brother was still dropping in as he usually would, we'd just have a beer , yarn , always made me feel better and gave me a real feel for things here, hard to explain. His gf's moved up though now,not seeing him much these days damn it.

Main thing worries me above all, is 1stly that stuff with that friend and his situation having to sell up and move now, at his age. What happens in this town and what people do themselves older, ldk ? Hope to talk to a few and find out but that's all a worry after hearing his stuff now. Time fly's so fast who knows for ourselves right.

The 2nd thing is if l blow my savings and energy building/extending here l couldn't do it again later if wasn't happy here but could l even sell it and at least recoup my savings spent doing it ?

lt'd be a different build, alternative, something l'd like for myself prob not worth much as a reseller or someone else's cup of tea. Unique usually gets stuck on the markets but in a place like this , worse.

Pros in just staying put are huge bc l'd be resettled and living for free on a lovely place and set, l could save heaps too. Buttttt, if l didn't like it later though or there was some other problems , l'd be older and could be stuck in a much worse situation.

l say it again, bloody hell. 

rx

[white knight]

Hi rx

Been a while and my notifications have been unreliable.

Your real estate questions are very normal, if people had the answers without gambling we'd all be rich.

I suppose I wouldn't do work on a place that I didnt feel 100% happy in the town. I'd chill until I knew.

How's your mental health going now mate?

TonyWK 

[randomxx]

Gday Tony. Yeah l'm not getting notices either except one out of the blue now and then, then it stops again.

Yeah , your right l guess about RE. Here a normal house would still sell ok but l don't wanna do normal if l did and couldn't afford it anyway. Different though, something alternative, l wouldn't risk it just to resell tbh as different, alternative, if it does sell it's usually gotta be dirt cheap to compensate hasn;t it bc so few want that.

l agree too on not doing any more right now, l'm just not comfortable about more atm bc l know in an area like this , without a house on it it won't make any difference from here.

Thx for asking to Tony but yeah, not great l'm afarid. l don't know why but for some reason l really feel loneliness out here it's full on. But all the indecision is and limbo isn't great either.  

Thanks for that anyway Tony, appreciated.

rx