Where is everybody ?

[OldFella]

Its been quite some time since I used this forum, and now when I feel at my worst I notice thee is very few people posting here anymore? I was hoping to connect to some like minded people in similar situations as myself...Alone, oldish (63), and very depressed. I have no friends in the city which I live, they have all died or moved away, there is literally no-one here I can relate to anymore. I am on medication for depression and often wonder why it seems not to work. It is very hard to get appointments anymore with health professionals. Is there some other part of this forum I am not seeing ? The post's here all are dated very long ago........

[Ggrand]

Hello Dear OldFella,

I do remember your name from some time ago but cannot find your old posts, I am living alone (widow) 67 have 3 fur babies, depression, anxiety, ptsd, melancholy and dissociation…

Around 6 years back, I had no friends, isolated myself for months at a time, then under Centrelink obligation had to volunteer….I started at a well known charity, I was very depressed and full of anxiety, but had to do it….6 years on my anxiety isn’t so bad meeting new people, it helps with my depression because my mind is being distracted from negativity on the 3 days I work, even though I can’t call my work colleagues friends, I get social time with them, something I never had before…

Do you work,  if not would volunteering be something you would look into?..

Maybe OldFella, a trip to your Dr. to see if a med adjustment is needed…The thing about meds is that it takes the edge of our depression/anxiety which is great, but they don’t heal it, we have to try, as hard, and it’s hard to do that sometimes, to distract our negative thoughts onto something else, Do you have any hobbies you like doing, maybe joining  a group that has your interest might help to find like minded people, then maybe friendships could build from their…

My kindest thoughts, 
Grandy..

[Croix]

Dear Oldfella~

I'd like to join Grandy in welcoming you back to the Forum which has probably changed its layout since you were last here.

While it would be good to put you back in contact with those you had talked with before it is hard as I can't find any posts under your name. Is it possible you have altered your name at all since you last used it?

Alternatively can you remember the names of anyone you had been talking to?

If you can come up with anything I'll look again

Croix

[OldFella]

Hi Grandy, thanks for the kind words, I do not work any longer as I cannot get motivated or concentrate, I always feel people are judging me coz I always feel that I look so worried and paranoid of everyone and everything. I have an appointment with my doctor tomorrow , hopefully she will have some answers but I have been like this for many years now..........I feel its all a waste of time .......I can have my meds increased or changed but always end up back in the same square..........Regards OldFella

[OldFella]

Hi Croix, I cannot remember anybody's name from years ago and maybe I was using a different name, I seem to remember losing log in info at one stage and creating a new account out of frustration ...thank you for your concern and kind words, there seems to be so much depression in the world theses days and no where to get help...some days are just so so hard to bear, I feel so ashamed and feel so weak for not having the strength to face daily task's........Regards OldFella

[Croix]

Dear Oldfella~

I guess wiht a new name htere is no way I can track it down, however if you contact the  moderators on moderators@beyondblue.org.au during business hours  they may be able to see your history, it's worth a go.

Otherwise  maybe you can gradually get a new group of friends. There are very may here wiht depression and have coped wiht it in different ways.  Your doctor may have something more to try, and maybe you can find something you like.

I tried to have something I'd enjoyed to do at the end of every day. Did not have to be anything much, from an ice-cream to a chapter in a favorite book or an episode of a TV show (there are may free in iView and SBS on demand)

It gave me something to look forward to every day

If you get the chance try to seek out occasions when you can talk with others. Trying to cope in isolation is not good. You do not have to talk about anything important, just chat. 

I know this seems not to fit with what you have said however it is worth considering if you can.

I also think you are judging yourself a bit harshly. If you were fit and well doing daily tasks would be easy, and if you did not you might consider yourself lazy. However here that is not the case, depression has its own rules and effects, and even getting up in the morning under it's influence is a victory.

Good luck with the doctor

Croix

[Fiatlux]

Hi OldFella,

Hope you are doing okay today.

I don’t believe we’ve ever met as I too have been off the forums for a whole entire year. Just logged back in the other day and found the reliable old friends on the BB Social forum.

I too was just too depressed this year to even interact with others. 

Try the BB Social forum and the social interaction may just help lift your mood.

The reliable others have as always responded to your message below.

Try to enjoy the end of 2023 and look forward to 2024!

Kindest regards, Fiatlux 🙏🏼

[white knight]

Hi, welcome

Unfortunately you've rejoined the forum in the quietest week of the year, nevertheless at least 3 of us community champions plus other member/s have answered your post.

We have a huge library here so access it using search if there is a topic of interest.

So, the forum is new to us and yourself, been in operation only months now. Simply post and wait for one of us to answer and I might add Old Fella, members posts are much less likely to be missed than with the previous forum.

I've been a champ for 10 years and cant recall your name but it is irrelevant, you will get the focus on your posts to the extend it deserves, but as an active week for us as well, we might be slower to reply. 

All the best.

TonyWK

[OldFella]

Thanks Fiatlux,It has been over a year since logging on here too, I too pray the year 2024 will bring some form of happiness, Not just for me but for everyone everywhere who is suffering...it seems so unfair..and it's times of the year like this that we really notice just how alone we are..

Regards OldFella

[mmMekitty]

Hello OldFellow

I'm so sorry, I"ve been intending to come by here to say "Hello". II don't know if our paths have ever crossed before here, or if my memory has not kept you on file.

This time of year certainly has a way of bringing to the fore some of our deeper emotions, often increasing any depression we might be feeling. It's all the more important to continue to do the things you have known to help, to do as you have done, which is to reach out.

As TonyWK has mentioned, this time of year seems to also see fewer members around the forums.

Since I don't think you know me either, I will say, I'm 64 now, living alone, but, I'm not a lonely person. I have sometimes felt alone & have yearned for connection to someone. That's pretty much why I joined BB, when my Psychiatrist was going on leave & I was feeling vulnerable & abandoned, so therefore feeling isolated & alone.

Depression & other mental health conditions are more often regarded more like having diabetes, epilepsy, hypertension - which are all health conditions that can be managed - not to be regarded with shame or guilt, not as weaknesses of personality, but as any other health condition is regarded.

Try & be a little easier on yourself.

I, too, enjoy some of the games & social threads in the BB Social Zone. The threads there seem to lighten the mood, & the load. Hope I'll see you there.

Hope you, OldFellow & everyone will have an enjoyable evening, & a brighter, happier 2024.

Hugzies

mmMekitty