What to say to my "helpful" friend? - feeling harrassed

[Lost_Girl]

I have major depression and have just had a visit from one of my closest friends after avoiding everyone for some time.  She has started sending me messages every songle day asking if I have showered, if I have gone outside in the sun for at least 5 minutes because you know vitamin d is good, did I eat the dark choc she gave me, etc.  If I write back and say no but I made it out of bed into the lounge room and ate a piece of bread she still emphasises how good it would be to shower and go outside. I feel like someone should be throwing a party that I moved but it's not enough for her.  Don't get me wrong, I know it would be great to do those things but I just can't. I also know she is trying to show she cares but the end of the day when she is "just checking in again" I just feel annoyed and I can't help thinking she will end up annoyed with me. What can I say to her?

[blondguy]

Hi LG

Depression can the same as a 'Tired' mind. Its not for everyone of course but its just what I have learned after 30 years of having 'The Black Dog' sitting next to me now and again.

If a person doesn't have Depression and are mentally and physically exhausted they would have the same reaction as you with depression. I am fortunate as I consider depression like a broken limb or a virus. Your friend is giving you everything she has but just cant see your plaster cast or the symptoms of your 'Virus'

Many excellent posts from sufferers above that are 'spot on' with Depression. Providing your friend with info is so right...even an A4 with just a few bullet points of what depression 'feels' like....the mental exhaustion etc...Even your friend would get bogged down with paragraphs...too much to digest even for a non sufferer.

I do agree that it can be exhausting when a friend is caring when they are unaware how to help in the first place

You are a Legend for posting your thoughts LG 🙂

((Hugs)) and Congrats to you! Yay!

Paul

[Lost_Girl]

Thanks so much Mrs.Dools, Fairywings and Paul.

All great advice. This particular friend still checks in regularly but is not so forcefull about trying to get me to do things I am not ready for.  

Through all of this I have been very conscious to keep in touch with my friends even though I am not up to seeing them in person. I know I will get through this and want to be able to celebrate with them when I do 🙂

LG xx

[Fairywings]

Yes beautiful mummy you can and you will get through this thanks for your encouraging words so glad to have helped you and always here if you need me xx i would luv to hear all about your celebration when the time comes about. Im so happy to that your friend is being considerate and acknowledging that u in fact do need some space to sort this out. Xx please keep in touch 😊