This forum is making me depressed 😕

[JayV]

I really thought joining an on line forum would help but feel more isolated and depressed reading others stories. The words of wisdom are great, most of us know what we should be doing: talking to some one, seeking medical help, going for walk or just getting some sunshine and fresh air. But when you have lost every thing: relationships, friends, employment because of your depression nothing makes sense any more. Nothing brings joy or happiness or some relief. So back l go under my doona, counting the days until l start TMS therapy then worrying myself sick that it won't work and this will be as good as it gets 😕 J

[blondguy]

Hey JayV

I havent read your other thread.....yet

Im sorry that you find the forum depressing. After having acute anxiety followed by depression since 1983 I and many others find the forums inspirational and of high therapeutic value.

Maybe the social threads would be a good idea for you at the moment. They have lighter content matter and may be of greater benefit to you in these difficult times.

If possible staying off the bed and using quiet occupation can help a lot 🙂

be gentle with yourself

Paul

[Croix]

Dear JayV~

Welcome to the Forum anyway. You are not alone in first impressions. A couple of years ago I started looking here and went away feeling sad. That changed, for me, after I started posting to someone who was experiencing exactly the same symptoms I used to get.

In a way the posts on the forum are a bit misleading. Basically as people get better they stop posting, which means you see people starting here, you see others giving their experiences and advice, then things stop.

From what you say you already have a good idea of what people recommend, talking, medical help, exercise and so on. Doesn't mean that they are bad suggestions. All the things have helped me personally.

I found when in a bout of depression that everything was hopeless and overwhelming. There was no relief or hope. Late on I found this was the illness taking over my thoughts - which I guess is exactly what depression is.

There are others here who have undergone TMS, you can read one thread - which started a long time ago - here

https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/online-forums/treatments-health-professionals-and-therapies/transcranial-magnetic-stimulation-(tms)-and-maois

Googling TMS beyondblue will bring up others.

Obviously that particular therapy is not the only one available, so even if results are less than hoped for there may well be other avenues to try. However at this stage there is no reason to think it will be ineffective.

Although you have said how you feel you have not talked much about yourself, your situation and life. Do you have a family - anyone to talk to that will understand?

We'd be very pleased if you posted again and talked some more, sometimes just doing that with others listening who understand can be a bit of a help

Croix

[Starwolf]

Hey JayV,

It is true that the discrepancy between knowing how things should be and what we can actually do can be an extra stressor.

We're not here to tell people what to do but to present options for people to consider. There are quite a few people who need to know these options exist.

Kudos to you for being proactive and starting TMS therapy. I hope it will initiate the turnaround you need and deserve.

How you wish to use these forums is up to you. It is your space. If you are not looking for advice, you only have to say so. I you just want to let steam off, please feel free to do so. The aim is to give silent suffering a voice. You will soon know which threads you feel comfortable visiting and those you don't.

What are your expectations ? How can we best help and support you ?

[Quercus]

Hi JayV,

I used to read the forums (and never wrote a word) when I was at my worst. But I used it in the wrong way. I used the posts to reaffirm to myself that I had no right to feel depressed because so many people were worse off than me. I didn't write to anyone and offer support even though I felt the same. I didn't ask for help online either even though thats the whole point of the forum.

My point is that the forums are what you make of them. It is trial and error but you need to work out which topics to avoid and focus on what helps you. Personally I love the thread store your happy memories here by Croix. I also had to set myself limits in terms of replies I'd make so that I don't get overwhelmed.

Even in the time I've been on here there are so many people who stop writing or even just post once. It is sad but you have to let it go and try focus on the good. And there is lots of good on the forums. I hope you stay around to see it 😊

[geoff]

hello JayV, this is how I felt when I first joined BB years ago, when Beyond Blue first started, until I found a post written by someone who had very similar problems that I have had to endue myself, that's when I started following their post and the all the replies they had received.
This then took me to what another person had said in replying and who was also suffering, and because they had the decency to try and help this other person, I felt they would like to have some support themselves, and so it goes on.

I found that someone else was hurting just as much as I was and had gone through what I had to experienced that's when online forums meant so much for me, I hope this is what will happen to you. Geoff.