Struggling

[Guest_13132322]

The last few weeks I have been suffering. I was hired for a job to become a manager, I was made to bring in new procedures and get the place running better before I was announced. It was something I worked hard for only to be deceived by the area manager. He promised 3 people the role and then gave it to someone completely different. I took it hard and found it hard to go into work for a couple of days. One day I got half way there, felt really bad and had to turn around and go home again. On my return to work he fired me with some excuse. I was one of the hardest working staff there and always did a great job and got lots of reviews. So I lost my job. Spent a couple of days unable to get out of bed. 

Now struggling to find a new job, I've always been employable and a great hard worker and it's really kicking me in the guts doing all these applications for no calls. Now I am worrying about finances. My girlfriend was supportive and got me feeling positive but now our relationship is failing. At the start of the year I packed up, moved all my things and sold off my appliances to get a place together. We were living 1.5hrs apart. I sacrificed, changed from my stable job to one that now screwed me over, moved to her area to make things easier and now that is falling apart because she is unhappy I have boxes stored in our garage that I haven't sorted and she wants it tidy. She knows I have been through a horrible few weeks. But now putting more strain on me while I am already down.

I have no money to move and get my own place, won't get a lease without work and I have no appliances any more. I feel like I have nothing left and no value or self worth. 

I don't know why it annoys me that we are having issues and she just goes to sleep so easy while I am awake at 3am crying because my life is going nowhere.

[Croix]

Dear new member~

Welcome here to the Forum, its a good place to look around and see others with similar problems and how they are coping.

I am not surprised your girlfriend can go to sleep and leave you annoyed at the fact you can't and are in tears. I've felt very resentful too when other peoples actions - or impractical unfeeling advice - has simply highlighted the gap between us. In fairness if somebody has not had poor life experiences they can't really be expected to understand -though that should not stop them expressing sympathy and consideration.

With the betrayal you have had at work -particularly when compared with the job you left - it is only natural it would have hit you hard. Sadly some people are underhanded users, and while you may be starting to get worried about money I would expect that job would have been a constant source of unhappiness.

Trying to find another job is hard - in fact it is one of the hardest things to have to face. Constantly trying and constant rejections - or no reply at all leaving you waiting indefinitely, it hurts the soul and the effects can take over your whole life.

May I suggest you try to partition your day, having time for job related matters -perhaps the morning, then at noon change to other pursuits. Something artistic perhaps, or going walking or ... I've no idea what you might like, the idea is to get you mind right away from that toxic job searching environment.

While you may now regret having moved you did what you thought was best at the tme, and showed great flexibility -and consideration - in making that move. I"m sure these qualities will stand you in good stead in another position when you find one

Provided it's OK with you I would like to know how you get on

Croix