Crying because others are hurting. When I read your post, I recalled many years ago when I completed uni and commenced employment in welfare. Several of my colleges were chatting and one beautiful soul explained what lead her to this employment. Explaining how her daughter had been brutally murdered by her partner. I folded. Being a young mum I couldn't think of a deeper pain. This was the making or breaking point in my career. I was of the firm belief I could never be competent in employment with the burden of another's anguish. Then this is what she shared with me. Which I have always believed in and lent upon. This helped me through when I could not speak.
Often in life we are confronted with the reality that we can't fix, cure, prove or win. However despite this we can still care, share and 'be there' for each other.
Interestingly it is the caring, sharing and understanding that provide the friendships
And fulfillment that give life quality.
Sometimes when we can't fix, cure prove or win we feel like withdrawing from a
Situation or a relationship because we feel helpless or vulnerable. I have found
That if you just 'hang in there' and take the challenge of 'being there' and 'riding the wave together' the results are amazing, even if it is 'a rough ride'.
If we know that someone wants to understand and care and that we are not alone, we can relax and free ourselves from fear and frustration.
Once a good friend came to me crying over the death of her mother, in my desire
To fix her, I said "Don't cry" to which she responded "Wendell, I have to". I was
Grateful for her honesty, that let me cry as well. Now I get relief from being able to share and care... A closeness and understanding that is more precious than a magical solution.
The resource of knowing I can be honest, even if it is tears or silence that express it,
Produces a strength of friendship that is greater than the fear that I must be strong or
Have all the answers when reality tells me that is not being honest anyway.
Anyway being friends is the best part of life.
