Scared unsure alone

[Boulvard]

Hi I'm new to this so please forgive me if i am posting in the wrong place, i am 51 and have been struggling with depression since my early 20s.

2010 my mother in law passed away from pancreatic cancer,2012 my father in law passed from lung cancer, 2012 my dear friend in her mind 40s passed away from lung cancer May 2013 my 20 yr relationship broke down and ended,

nov 2014 my stepmum passed away after a long battle with stomach cancer, jan 19th 2015 my mum passed away after a long and horrible battle with parkinson's, jan 19th 2016 my father passed away after a stroke, heart attack then finally bowel cancer.

I feel that i am currently in the darkest place i have ever been, i live alone with only my two dear little cats as company as i have steadily since approx 2014 withdrawn from most social contact not deliberately it's just happened that way.

my doctor has said i have major depression and ptsd, i am on meds and now he wants to start a treatment of ketamine,

Im scared and alone and i guess just wanted to talk

[zaidoo12]

I am also new here and feeling alone too. I am sorry for what happened.

i also feel alone even if i have so many people around me. no one seems to understand how hard where i am now. this is my first 2 years in the country and never been far from my family.

i grew up not having so much friends and people not liking me because i look like a meanie for them. My father's family never liked my family because they didn't like my mother. So i grew up trying to prove people that i could also be liked and loved but I failed. i never felt the feeling i wanted after all these years. You are so brave and strong. I am only 27 and here i am complaining. but i guess different stories has different wounds and scars that reminds us how strong we are.

[Canon500d]

Hi Boulvard.

You have been through a lot and it will take its toll on you, there's no doubt about it.

You have lost loved ones and feel alone.

But You have the strength to reach out for help with your dr and us. So many of us who undertand how you are feeling. The dark place you are experiencing isn't nice. We know it and understand it too well.

Don't be scared and alone. Always remember you are not alone with us. Keep talking to us and let us know how you progress.

Give your dear little cats a cuddle for us..