Quality of life

[LC80]

I am trying to deal with a severe lumbar spine injury, that has gotten worse over a number of years. Currently I am not able to walk unaided, can not do anything outside in the fresh air, and my hobby, that is so good for my mental health, has been curtailed. I have suffered bouts of depression for many years, and just as I was getting into a good place, I have had this latest setback. I am retired and now live in a small country town and medical services are limited. I need to travel 160 ks from home to access specialist care, so it's a long and tiring day as a round trip. My wife is my support and I don't wish to be a burden on her any more than totally necessary. I feel that I am just lost and fear what the future holds for us both. If it is surgery, a poor outcome would change our lives forever. Retirement was supposed to be better than this.

[Sophie_M]

Hi LC80,

We are sorry to hear that things have been so difficult for you and that you have been feeling lost and unsure of what the future holds. We understand this must be such a tough time, for both yourself and your wife, so please know that you never have to go through this alone, and support is always here for you.

If you would like to talk to someone, the Beyond Blue Support Service is available 24/7 by phone on 1300 22 4636 or on Webchat 1pm-12am AEST on our website: www.beyondblue.org.au/getsupport  One of our friendly counsellors will be able to talk through these feelings with you and can offer support, advice and referrals.

Please feel free to keep reaching out here on your thread whenever you feel up to it.

[geoff]

Hello LC80, before we retire we hope that it will be full and prosperous and enjoy our time to finally be by ourselves and do what we have always wanted, unfortunately, we never take into account that physically this may prevent us from being able to, I feel sorry for you, as my circumstances have prevented me as well.

Having to travel 160 km is a long way if you are in discomfort and wonder if you are able to have any hydrotherapy or aquatic physiotherapy either at a public pool or maybe someone you know who has a swimming pool.

Geoff.

[LC80]

I am running out of physical and mental energy. The constant pain is causing me to be depressed and the spiral downwards begins. It feel like I am being sucked into a vortex. Life was not supposed to be like this. I have been a horrific person sometimes so maybe it's just natures way of paying me back.

[Sophie_M]

Dear LC80,

We can hear just how hard things are for you at the moment with the constant pain, downward spiral and the feeling that life was not meant to be like this. Its almost no wonder you feel like you're running out of physical and mental energy. It takes a lot of courage to reach out to our online community and we’re really glad that you have.

We want to remind you that all life is important, including yours and you have significant strength and deserve to live a happy life, not just survive.

We want you to know that there is always extra immediate support available to you, whether it's from our professional mental health counsellors Beyond Blue (available 24/7 on 1300 22 4636) or our friends at Lifeline (13 11 14) or the Suicide Call Back Service (1300 659 467).

We hope that you stay safe but strongly urge you that if you feel like acting on thoughts of ending your life, then this is an emergency and you should contact 000 immediately.
 
Keep checking back in with us whenever you need to.

[LC80]

I am in constant pain all my waking hours, and can only walk for a few minutes before the pain becomes unbearable and I need to sit down. Life is pretty much house confinement with the only joy is still being able to do my two shows a week on community radio. It is very unlikely that I can see a specialist until March or April 2022. So four or five months of depressing pain ahead, if I can stand it. Fortunately I have a very understanding wife with me. I feel that I am minimising her joy for life while I am incapacitated somewhat. It is what it is.

[LC80]

Well here we are and it's nearly April. It marks six months of constant health issues. My spinal problems are pretty bad, and I have seen a specialist who confirmed that I will be dealing with severe arthritis and narrowing of the spinal nerve canals with associated pain for the rest of my life. Surgery is planned for a bit later to try and alleviate some of the pain. I have had six weeks of an lung disease exacerbation that is hard to knock down. I have spent some time in hospital because of it. I really feel that I have turned a corner with my health and it's all down hill from here. I am scared! Life, at the moment, is just getting me down.