Out of nowhere

[Tomutd]

First time poster so will see how this goes. I've had a girlfriend for 8 months now and we're as close as ever, things have moved quickly. She recently moved to start her new job, only 45 mins away. Works 9-5:30 I work 2pm til midnight. Communication has become the main issue for us. Anyway it was only 2 days ago that I woke up and it was like my mind had done a backflip. To the point where I told her I didn't wanna leave my job to go live with her even though we'd spoken about it numerous times. I couldn't even tell her I loved her. Never had this happen before. I've had a sick feeling ever since and I feel like I've ruined something that was so perfect. I'm not exactly sure what switched. But I just feel horrible hurting someone I love and care about. Just not sure how to rectify it. I'm feeling so overwhelmed by it all.

Thanks for taking the time to read

[demonblaster]

Hey Tom welcome 🙂

Wouldn't make you feel good aye

You didn't want to hurt her but something's made you feel this way, always hard not knowing, once we do we can start working on a fix hopefully

Communication's become the main issue, is that because of the different hrs of work or is it not happening as well as before. Wondering if that could be the concern for you.

It sounds like you're so happy with her & that you do love her maybe do ya think moving in together might be a bit daunting for you, I don't know just running ideas by 🙂

You know how you couldn't say you love her, from what you said sounds like you do, do you suffer anxiety at all?

Hope yous can work it out Tom & that yous are still in touch, if not a suggest to let her know how you're feeling & that you really do care & didn't wanna hurt her cause you don't want to lose her, sounds like yous are a good match

Hope you feel comfortable to return, very good no judge supportive site here

cya later 🙂 all best

[geoff]

hi Tom, I know someone who worked the same hours as you do, while his wife looked after their two young children, slightly different I know but similar circumstances, but it really suited them both, so different working hours is no reason why you couldn't live together, you have the weekends together and perhaps a few hours before one of you has to go to work.
I do agree with Demonblaster and you could be suffering from anxiety, however if you can google the K-10 test, it's a test to indicate whether or not you maybe suffering from depression, because both of these go together, but one maybe worse than the other.
If you do it then try it a few times at different times of the day then you will get an average of how you maybe feeling.
If the score is high then you should book an appointment with your doctor to give you a diagnosis and then appropiate measures will be put into place to help you. Geoff.

[Tomutd]

The different hours of work make it really hard to talk during the week. I'm not sure whether moving down there would be the best option for me. I've just put a lot of work into where I am today and I told her it would be too hard for me to just drop everything, pack up and move.

I've never felt this way before just with day to day things. not sure if I could potentially have some form of anxiety. Mental health does run in the family though as my dad has bipolar disorder.

i will have a look at the K-test and see how things go. Thanks for taking the time to read and reply guys.