New here. Is life supposed to be like this?

[FightingFree12]

Hi all

I am suffering what I’m assuming is depression. I have suffered mild anxiety over the years and have worked extremely hard to cope with that. I found a deep spiritual faith early last year and had my life on a good track. But sadly towards the end of last year I let myself go and have felt useless, hopeless and have zero self-worth. I am a 24 year old nurse working through this crisis and while I’m grateful for a job I wish I too had an excuse to stay in bed all day like people who have lost their job. I see people on social media exercising and being active and I can’t even fathom moving my body or eating healthy. I’m eating a lot, tonnes of sugar and fatty foods. I’ve put on 8kg. I feel horrendous but am in such a dark place to have any hope of healing myself. I planned on moving to Canada in July this year and finding a new life for myself. But now that has all been ruined. I have a supportive family but no friends. I have never made friends for the past 6 years and my high school friends are very far away. I feel so extremely lost and hopeless about life and especially this pandemic. How long will life have to be stagnant and mundane for? I’m not suicidal but I genuinely can’t begin to imagine having to live a life this flat for another 70+ years. Any tips for depression welcomed. Thank you

[Lenscap]

This is a fantastic description of depression.

Your situation could be a case study here because really you present all the positive characteristics for a successful recovery. Off the bat, you won't need to waste years of time and money on psychoeducation about your position or what the steps are to get back on track.

Overcoming this will only increase the value you are to our community because you will be able to help others get through this.

Ill remind you what IM sure you already know are the secrets.
1. Call your GP and if you dont have one, get one (they are free). Every GP in the country is now seeing anxiety and depression all day, not covid cases. They are a great independent measure of your progress over the next few months, as your assessment isnt always going to be reliable (will be too hard on yourself).
2. Chuck that phone (you know what I mean), it's evil. I find myself wasting my life on it and it never makes me feel any better about myself either.

3. Just gotta get out the door. Youre not starving yourself which is great and if your putting on weight it means your giving your body the energy it needs to take on the challenges ahead of you. The trick is now to put that energy to use. Get out the door forget the fancy gym gear or planning. Just get around the block. Its honestly how the journey begins. Exercise is strangely satisfying because you can set yourself goals and actually achieve them in under 30 minutes.

You are so young and have achieved so much to be proud of. The job is great at expending energy and it doesnt need to define you. If you talk to people on your ward they will have very similar experiences, but talking alone wont make the feelings go away. The trick is to crawl, walk, run then fly. You are not at the end of your journey and you know what you need to overcome this and get to the next stage. Work toward your goal, try new experiences and people will notice.

I know you can do this!

[missingpuzzlepiece]

Hey Frightfree12,

You are not going to like my response, as I am going to give you a list of things you must do, starting tomorrow. Don't worry, I will explain why for each one.

1. Your work will have an EAP, talk to them tomorrow. You are overworked, stressed and they will understand, with everything going on, they will understand without a doubt. They are there to help you, so use them.

2. Reduce your time looking at social media. Keep using it for chatting to freinds, but stop the comparing yourself to what others are doing, they probably could not expend the same energy for a full shift you have to right now.

3. Tell a trusted supervisor that you are feeling drained by everything right now, coping but drained. Maybe let them know you are going to use the EAP but either way, ask them if you can check in with them each day at the end of your shift. This will give you chance for a daily debreif, a chance to vent to a like professional and reduce the mental strain you take home each day.

4.Order some meals, have them delivered, and eat healthy! You know the nutrition rules that a tired body will crave sugars and fats. A nurse walks how many kms a day doing ward checks? Yeh you sure will be tired and seeking that boost every day.

5. Moving to Canada ruined or just delayed? You said it yourself, 70+ yrs of life to do amazing things and see the world. Just a setback, not the end of that plan. Download a picture of your fave place in Canada, set it as your phones wallpaper, a constant reminder of what is possible in the future.

6. All of this is because you can nip this in the bud! You recognise the signs, you are in the mindset to get help, so go get it, go feel better, it is easier right now than in a week, or two, or more. Don't wait another day to ask for help.

Finally, thank you, for everyday you go help the community, we all breathe a sigh of relief and hope. You are making a difference everyday to so many people you may never meet, so thank you. Now go get the help you need to enjoy all that life can offer.